What It Means To Be Human
by Lost Scarlet
Summary: We grew up together, Shuuichi and I. But he never looked at me, even though I always stared. But here I was, standing in shock in his arms while he hugged me in a different way than he usually did. Now, what was the cost for his love? KuramaxOC?
1. PREVIEW

So, just to point and laugh at anyone awaiting the arrival of new chapters and/or the new story, "What it Means To Be Human"

Here are bits of the new and upcoming story

btw, the scenes are in random order. I can't promise you that these scenes will come in the order they're here

* * *

"I'll be alright," she coughed. "Everything's going to be alright--"

"Don't say that," I begged, holding her hand tightly. She didn't _seem_ sick. In fact, my mother looked completely healthy with her firm grip and wide smile... but the way she looked at me with weak eyes, and how her words cut through me...

"Why?" she mused, but I could tell that she really was, in fact, confused.

"Because, if you say that... then you'll get sicker, or you'll di--" my words jumbled together in my throat, unable to push out as I watched her arch her back and open her mouth.

It was a silent scream, so all I saw was her thrashing around while the moniter went crazy. The nurses and doctors outside finally ran in due to the beeping. They started to pull me away, but I desperately held onto her hand.

_No,_ I thought childishly. _If I let go of her hand, then she'll--_

**_BEEP--_**

There it went. The ominous, drawn out pitch from the moniter, sounding off that her heart had stopped. I looked at my empty hands while the hospital staff assigned to my mother ran around her, trying to revive her.

But I knew it was too late.

* * *

"Forgive me," I cried, holding his hand. "I didn't listen to you and--"

"It's alright," he gave me a weak smile, touching my face.

"No," my eyes widened at how it was like _dejavu_ all over again. "Don't say that, Shuuichi. If you say that, then--"

"I won't die," he groaned. "I promised to Hana-San and to my friends that I wouldn't..."

"But... it's my fault," I whimpered. "It's always my fault that everyone gets hurt."

His green eyes softened. "Ka--"

"Your father," I said, making him wince. "My mother, your friends, and even you..."

"Kanna!" he yelled as the monster started making its way towards us again, suantering closer and closer. Staring into its red eyes, I felt as if I was staring straight at death.

* * *

I found myself in complete darkness as I tried to walk around. Several times I tripped or bumped into obstacles. They seemed to be trees or rocks, but I kept going even though I had recieved several cuts on myself.

Soon, I collapsed onto flat, level ground, unable to feel my legs. They were like dead weights.

_Shuuichi_... I thought. He was the last person I saw before I was pulled through. His gentle green eyes became sharp and menacing, glaring at what had ahold of me. _He knows something._

"There seems to be someone here," a child's voice echoed around me.

"Perhaps it is the girl," another voice, deeper, spoke. I knew for certain that it was of a man's.

"The one that Youko told us of?" the child spoke again.

A light spilled around me and my eyes widened at the sight. There were monsters and people all around me. Vines grew around them, but I could make it out that they were of stone. They were all in different positions; sleeping, sitting, running, fighting, crawling--and I was starting to be one of them.

I paled, looking to my legs; slowly, they were turning into stone. My shirt had slightly lifted up and I realized that my waist was grey and hard.

"I'm quite amazed that you are still mobile," a man appeared infront of me, looking down at me with a calm smile that was similar to Shuuichi's. No, he wasn't looking--he could hear me. The man was pale and tall, with his eyes closed. Several ears and horns accompanied his look, but either way he still had a high, aristrocratic feel about him. At his side stood a boy with black hair as well, his eyes were innocent but held great power and knowledge.

"Are you Kanna?" the boy asked. I nodded in response.

"I am Yomi," the man said. "_Shuuichi'_s old friend."

* * *

"Look!" I pointed at the butterflies that flew around the garden.

"I've never seen that many butterflies together," Shuuichi commented. "I've seen groups of different kinds, but they're all the same."

"It's so pretty," I laughed as a couple came over towards us.

"Say, let's go back with the group, I'm sure 'Kaa-San and your father are starting to become suspicious."

"Alright," I blushed at the thought of us being together. Realizing we were alone together, I wouldn't have minded if we stayed like this a bit more. It was just like elementary, how we would always be left alone together because I was the cry baby or the most curious, venturing away from the group. Then Shuuichi would always come after me and the teacher would get mad, worrying her like that.

* * *

_Running desperately away, the loss of blood from the wounds caused me to double over and fall, crying out in pain._

_"Over there!" people screamed, the lights getting closer._

_"What are you doing there?" a deep voice from above asked. Looking up I saw him; he was absolutely beautiful and terrifying, with his silver hair and gold eyes. He stood atop a roof with his arms crossed and his tail swaying behind him. "Can you not run? Where has your power gone?"_

_"That is of no concern to you," I seethed, shaking as I got to my feet._

_"My, the greatest assassin of all three worlds is dying?" he laughed mockingly._

_"Oy, Youko, let's go," a young bat demon appeared at his side, shuffling his wings._

_"Just watch, Youko Kurama," I glared at him. "I will return to kill you, one way or another_."

_"Good luck," he disappeared with his friend while the group of samurai surrounded me._

_"Killer! We have you!"_

_My scream echoed as they struck down their blades._

* * *

yes, I know the last one is in italics but that's one purpose.

and it's pretty confusing huh?

leave reviews with your thoughts or suggestions of what I should have in the new series


	2. PROLOGUE

_**Prologue**_

_The moon was full that night, and together with the stars they watched everything that was going on. They watched every sin I committed, including the ones that happened that night._

_Tears streamed down my cheeks as I walked up to my mother who had her back turned to me, crouched over the tub filled with cold water and the dirty kimono and yukata._

That was how it all started. My first murder.

_"Sayonara," I said, my eyes were wide and already full with guilt as she turned around with a relaxed smile but her face quickly lit up with surprise and fear. Unable to stop myself, I brought down the blade against her, causing her blood to stain my pure white yukata._

One.

_Her scream brought my father out to the yard, "What's going on?" With inhuman speed I charged at him. His blood splattered onto my face and it dripped off of my chin, mixing with my tears._

Two_._

_"'Tou-San? 'Kaa-San?" my brother hurried out of his room with his sword in hand. Slowly, I turned to him with my hand in the air, holding the blade up to moonlight causing it to gleam red and silver. Before he could react, his blood was already staining my clothes as he toppled down onto the porch. His and father's blood pooled together, dripping off onto the ground._

Three.

_I dropped to my knees, finally regaining control of my own body, clutching the knife in my hands._

I'm sorry.

_A man then appeared, clapping as he walked towards me. "That was a beautiful show!" he ran his fingers through my wet hair. "Such a shame that you got your hair dirty. No matter, you can still wash--" he gasped as I pushed the blade deeper, a sneer on my lips._

_"You made me kill them," I hissed as the tears started to blur my vision and the smell of the blood started to burn my nose._

Four.

From then on, I could no longer keep track of those who I had killed.

_"What are you doing there?" a man called from the beginning of the alleyway where I stood at the end, bodies strewn inbetween us with their blood soaking into the ground. "You are killing aimlessly."_

_My eyes were narrowed at him as I leaned against the blood painted walls tiredly. Now I killed more and more just to keep the guilt from catching up to me._

_"Come with me and I will take care of you." his smile was truly sincere._

_Slowly I walked towards him, stepping over the bodies as I tucked the blade away. This man, I would not kill._

* * *

**So leave your thoughts/comments and reviews!**


	3. Introductory

**Sorry for the lateness (bows) But the issue was that the stories were on my laptop and my desktop had internet (sweat drops)**

**see the issue there? so I JUST like... 'borrowed' my dad's memory chip thing and then carried it over here and then deleted it from his chip's memory so... it's all good... I WAS going to ask but haha he's not here .**

**Also, I know this chapter will confuse you but don't worry, it'll make sense later...(much later)  
**

Shuuichi Minamino. Handsome, nice, smart--a genius actually, and... perfect? Was that pushing it?

But everytime I saw him, there was always something... off.

Yes, I knew him since we were babies but that was because of our parents.

Kids _always_ knew each other because of their parents. Our dads got along great, already being collegues from high school. Our mothers met through their husbands, of course.

Then, I met Shuuichi through our moms. Of course, I doubt even Shuuichi remembers the first time we met--

I had just popped out into the world for two mere hours, crying and crying, blind to the strange world with strange sounds.

Mom told me that she was taking a nap while Dad brought Shuuichi and his parents to meet me. Shiori was holding Shuuichi in her arms, pointing at me, saying how cute I was. Saying I would be his future wife.

Dad still hung onto that, hoping Shuuichi would look at me as more than a neighbor. More than a friend. More than just the girl he knew since he was two and a half years old.

Then there was Mom, who became blind after a fire accident that moved me to another neighborhood, out of the vicinity that was Shuuichi's street.

She thought we were dating, since that's what Dad and I told her.

Now she lies in the hospital, doing her best to fight the illness that was threatening to kill her, just so she could attend our wedding.

Is it bad that I want her to die early, so I wouldn't have to tell her that there would be no wedding? Not ever?

Sure, I felt a slight warmth in my cheeks whenever I saw him, and became nervous every time he held my hand--like a friend, mind you. Then there would be my beating heart. Beating harder and louder and faster each time, mocking and laughing at me. Half of the beating was caused probably of hormones but the other half was of how guilty I felt around him. How much I wanted to say that I was sorry, but knowing that it was too late to.

When I was four, I went to work with our dads. Halfway through the day, I began to cry, wanting to play or do anything that didn't involve just sitting there with sucky crayons and a now filled children's sketchbook. My dad, having a higher position than Shuuichi's, couldn't just take a break to drive me home. So, at the cost of losing some money from his paycheck Shuuichi's dad decided to drive me home.

But he lost more than he bargained for.

I remember vaguely though, strangely. He let me sit in the passenger seat, and I was so happy! I looked out the window, holding his hand thinking that I would fly out since it was completely down.

He chuckled, "I've got you, you're not going to fly away." I looked at him, my smile wide, slowly slipping my hand out of his. "Are you sure?" he smiled. I nodded, holding the seatbelt that was too big for me.

Suddenly, I don't remember why, but the breaks or something broke and the car kept going and going, even though it was a sharp curve. We hit the metal railing, but it didn't flip over like you saw in movies or cartoons since we didn't have enough speed or momentum. We just... _crashed_. Being in Japan, we were driving on the left side of the road, so it was Shuuichi's father that got..._squished_.

I remember, sitting there in shock, my arms atop of the inflated bag that protected me from flying forward and hitting my head. For a few moments he was still alive, so he just smiled painfully, reaching out and gripping my hand. "Don't worry, I've got you," he whispered before his grip loosened.

I cried silently, holding his bloody hand.

I don't remember Shuichi ever crying, even when I stupidly held up the broken glasses of his father to him. It was crusted with dried blood, but I wanted to cheer him up so I tried to him give him a momentum of his father. Even if the momentum was broken and bloody. He looked at me with empty eyes, but they slightly lit up at me. Shuuichi took the glasses from my bandaged hand, and patted me on the head.

"Thank you," he said. That made me cry harder.

At age nine, I started to realize that I liked Shuuichi. A lot.

But he was two years higher than me, so I could only play with him after school. Other classmates would always make fun of me, bullying me and saying that I had no other friends.

Shuuichi would always come along, though, yelling at them to go away. For some reason, they were always scared of him when he yelled, but I didn't think about it.

He even entered a prestigious junior high that I couldn't reach, and then he entered a high school that I still couldn't get into.

Of course, I never made my feelings known, even up till now in my third and final year of high school, standing with a thick black folder in one hand and a notebook of phone numbers and emails in the other. Wearing my black and gray uniform for the last day, I smiled widely as I saw my dad sit down with a camera in hand. Soon after, I saw Shiori and Shuuichi appear without their new family members. I felt a twinge of guilt; Shiori's new husband and son must've felt left out.

Dad waved at me and I nodded, telling him that I saw. There were many flashes of light and lots of talking except when the principal announced how proud everyone was and must be.

After all that, I ran into Dad's arms.

"Kanna," Dad hugged me tightly.

"So, did you find out where you're going to attend next?" Shiori asked with a beaming smile.

"Ugh, I wish I was finished with school," I stuck out my toungue. "But I tried out for Tokyo U."

"Well then, let's see if you got in," Dad enthusiastically rushed over to the large banners to were now rolled down, fighting with students trying to see their number on them.

I sighed, shaking my head. "I thought I was supposed to do that."

Shuuichi was chuckling, "I remember when I was looking for my number, you faked at injury to catch everyone's attention so they moved out of the way." he pinched my cheek.

"Hey," I pulled away blushing.

"Kanna," Dad came back with his eyes pushed together. "You're number was Seventy-Six, right?"

"Yeah," I was waiting for him to tell me I got it. I mean, I _did_ get in right? Shuuichi was going there, and he promised to help me if I did. Not only that, I could spend more time with him.

He sighed, scratching his head. "I couldn't find your number."

"Oh, my," Shiori put her hand to her mouth. "Are you sure, Mamori-San?"

"I could go check again," Shuuichi started his way but my dad started to laugh--of course.

When I was eleven, he had done the same thing to me after graduating from elementary. Mom smacked him with her purse after he had his laugh and ruffling my black hair, but he brushed it off. Shuuichi gave a small smile at that time while Shiori was shaking her head.

"Dad," I smacked his arm.

"Sorry, was that horrible?" he hooked his arm around my heck, pulling me to his chest.

"Yes!" I was about to half-shriek, but it wasn't caused by anger, but of exasperation. "I thought I had to study for twenty-four-seven again, just to try for another place."

"Aw, my poor baby girl," he smothered me with his large arms. Flailing--or alteast attempting to-- I tried to wiggle out of his hold. Shuuichi helped pull me out, and I ended up in his arms, looking directly into his face that was only a few inches away from mine. For a moment, I forgot to breathe, but I regained my form, pushing myself away with heat starting to rise into my cheeks.

"Thank you for the save," I smiled at him.

"No problem," he smiled back.

"So, why won't we all go out to celebrate?" Shiori clasped her hands together. "A different place than Shuuichi's though."

"I vote we invite the other half of your family," dad nodded.

"I'll go call them," Shiori walked off to find a quiet place, opening her cell phone.

Dad than picked up his own, recieving a call from his work. "I'll be right back," he walked off towards the same direction as Shiori.

"So," Shuuichi started.

"Ah, that's right," I bowed to him. "Thank you for tutoring me for the examinations!"

"Again, no problem," he patted my head. It was something he had started, but it wasn't anything special. Atleast, not to him anyways.

The beating in my chest got harder, and I swallowed before looking into his strange colored eyes that shined a brilliant green, holding secrets. The way he acted and looked, contemplating or taking things in, it was all strange to me--or atleast unique. Shuuichi always had this air about him, that was more aged and filled with more knowledge than anyone that I had met. It was similiar to the air around the elderly, that sat and saw everything around them. Yet, there was always a strange breathe of sadness with him as well.

"Kanpai!" We all cheered, thrusting our small alcohol glasses filled with lemonade. My mouth was as wide as it could go, forming a large smile. Dad started to say something, but a phone call made him sigh as I hurried over to the kitchen from the living room.

"Moshi moshi?" I answered, still in a giggle fit.

"_Ah, this is the principal at Tokyo University, I am looking for Shikusa, Kanna, onegaishimasu._" said a rough, voice from the other end.

"Oh," I was surprised. "This is she."

"_Well, it's very nice to talk to you,_" he said. "_I'm actually quite anxious to meet you during our appointment. But, unfotunately, a problem arose._"

"A problem?" I repeated.

"_We're asking all students to start their year next spring, instead of this upcoming spring._"

"Might I ask why?" I leaned against the wall, shrugging to my dad who came in curiously, wanting to know what was going on.

"_There are problems with teachers for now, and we need to rebuild a couple dormitories as well._" he paused.

"Ano... I heard this rumour that someone hacked into your computer systems--"

"_And they succeeded,_" he sighed. "_That is all, I'm sorry about the inconvenience_."

"No, no," I was frowning in the inside. "This just gives me the time to take a break from school work."

He was laughing. "_Well, enjoy your little break._"

I placed the phone away and turned to see my dad with raised brows. "Well?"

"Uhh, I have to start College next spring instead."

"What?!" his eyes bulged out as he picked up the phone.

"Calm down dad," I tried to pry it out of his hands. "They're just having some problems at the dorms and the computers, so--"

"Then I'll fix it!" he pulled so roughly I lost my grip on the phone, stumbling and unfortunately heading towards the floor. Suddenly, I found myself in Shuuichi's arms again.

"Two," he said. "That was the second time I've caught you today."

"Um-uh, thanks!" I then realized I couldn't get out of his hold. Heat quickly danced up to my face, as I squirmed.

"Did you know you're very huggable?" he smiled.

Blushing, I realized that dad had started to dial but at that moment, I heard a loud thunder clap with flashes of light outside the window--_bzzt_. With that, the power went out.

"Kuso!" dad slammed the phone down, blindly walking around the kitchen hazardly, looking for candles.

"Aw man!" Shuuichi's brother moaned from the living room. I heard rustling which meant he was lying down on the couch.

"Mamori-San," Shiori called, hearing some clanking from the kitchen. "Don't hurt yourself."

I started to tremble, jumping at the sound of another thunderclap. I turned around in Shuuichi's arms, wrapping my arounds him and burying my face in his chest.

"Shh," his breathe tickled my ear. "I'm right here."

"Ow!" Did my dad hit his head on the wall? "Ah! What if the hospital lost power too?"

"It's alright, Mamori," Shuuichi chuckled. "They have two back up generators."

A light appeared in the dark, illuminating a part of the kitchen, showing Kazuya, Hatanaka holding a candle over my dad who was texting on his phone-- probably to a doctor at the hospital.

"I'm going to take Kanna upstairs," Shuuichi said, pulling my legs over his arm, starting to carry me upstairs.

"Of course," Shiori smiled at us. "Kanna is still scared of thunder, isn't she?"

"Lightning too!" I whined.

I woke up to loud laughing from downstairs from my Shuuichi's dad along with mine. Dazily, I sat up remembering how I fell asleep, trembling in Shuuichi's arms...

...In Shuuichi's arms? I looked down, noticing how his right arm lied across my waist while his left was still on the bed. He was still lying next to me, sleeping peacefully. My heart beat quickened--what to do? Let him sleep or wake him up?

"Mm--" he yawned, opening his eyes to reveal their green color. I smiled childishly, narrowing my eyes as I pushed some of his red hair out of his face.

"Ohayogozaimasu," I gave him a kiss on the forehead, just like when we were kids--but the meaning changed for me after I realized my feelings for him. I wonder if he felt it? Every time I gave him a kiss, I always wished it was on the lips, where he could kiss back.

"Ohayo," he kissed my chin before sliding off the bed to stretch.

"Ne, Shuuichi," I brought the pillow into my arms.

"Yes?" he turned around.

"A couple years ago," I paused. Was it okay to ask? It probably wasn't any of my business-- "While you sent your parents off on a honeymoon, and while your brother was at his friend's house... I came by but you weren't home. You weren't home until right before your parents came back... can I ask where you were?"

Something crossed into his eyes, but they were replaced with humor. "Where? I was with my friends, we decided to go on a vacation--"

"Where did you go?"

"Guess," he winked at me, walking into my private bathroom.

I smiled at the closed door.

Let the games begin.

* * *

...

YESSS!! drops on knees and cheers

INTERNETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!

xDDDDDDDDDDDDD

**_REVIEWS:_**

**Out-of-Control-Authoress** - Thank you for the reviews! (heart)

**XXTakaraXX** - Thank you too, for the reviews! (hearts)

**Daeth101 - Fox Version** - Rofl, i love your deep thinking xD it makes me laugh whenever I compare to my plot. don't worry, I'm not laughing _at_ you. that kind of laughing is reserved for myself


	4. Giberish

I don't know,  
How it all came to that point,  
Where I could no longer,  
Control myself.

That night was dark,  
And it was only me,  
The moon,  
And the man that pulled my strings.

I was his puppet,  
His little doll to play with,  
As he was also my voice,  
The one that chose the words.

"Sayonara," he moved my lips,  
As mother crouched innocently,  
Washing our clothes with the cold, cold water.

Then she turned around,  
With that beautiful smile,  
Playing on those lips,  
That used to sing my lullaby.

Now a scream left through them,  
Which brought my father out,  
That was when he saw me,  
Standing next to Mother,  
With my Yukata stained red.

"What's going on?!" he exclaimed,  
And then he fell,  
After I pulled the blade out.

My elder brother now,  
Ran out of his room,  
In his hands were his blade,  
The one that Grandfather gave.

Before he could react,  
He was lying next to Father,  
And their blood pooled together.

Now the strings,  
Were off of me now,  
So I started to cry,  
Clutching the blade close to me.

"That was beautiful," the puppet master clapped,  
He ran his hand,  
Through my blood soaked hair,  
Saying, "Such a shame you dirtied your hair."

That was when,  
I stabbed him,  
and he too,  
fell to the ground.

"I hate you!" I screamed,  
As the tears refused to stop,  
While the smell of blood,  
Made my nose start to sting.

I liked the pain,  
Of the heavy stench of blood,  
that attacked my nose.

I didn't feel sick,  
But soon, I knew,  
The guilt would catch up.

So I killed,  
And killed,  
and killed...

And the thrill,  
Pushed away,  
All the guilt,  
That started to build.

"On that night,"  
I would sing,  
And the people would,  
turn to listen,

"I killed four people,"  
They stepped away,  
at that point.

"There was Mother,  
And Father,  
And big brother too,"

The whistles would  
Get louder,  
And the police would appear,  
"Then there was,  
The man that made,  
Me kill them all..."

I would stop my walking,  
And my humming too,  
Just to turn around,  
To smile and bow.

Then altogether,  
They would lean forward,  
To return the bow,  
But they just kept,  
Going and Going.

They all collapsed,  
Onto the ground.  
And I resumed my walk,  
Singing the same words,  
Until more came along.

* * *

Yeah, I was bored so with this random gibberish, it will give you more insight on the prologue :)

This will be here temporarily until I put up the next chapter


	5. Tag

**This one is in Kurama's POV**

Shikusa, Kanna; A childhood friend of mine who was the only daughter of Shikusa, Mamori and Shikusa, Hana.

The way she moved around me and the way she looked and talked to me made her feelings clear. Of course, no one noticed--I was probably the only one that watched everyone and everything so carefully. Then there was the fact where I could tell how fast her heart beat was and that I could see the slight shade of pink that came to her cheeks every time I touched her.

_Pretend. Play along._

That's what I did. I acted as if I didn't know.

"You need a girl, Kurama!" Yusuke would joke every once in a while.

"If you want, I could find someone for you," Kuwabara would give a large grin. "I am, after all, the master of love!"

To find a partner would be of no trouble. I had many candidates from school who would gladly go out on a date with me instead of just getting together in small study groups as it usually was with me.

"Scared, Shuuichi?" Kaitou had asked one day.

"Of what?" I raised a brow with an amused smile.

"If you were to get too close to someone of the opposite gender--or of the same gender, whichever you preferred..." he paused, looking to see if I had a reaction. Merely, I stared emotionlessly. "Then the past you so desire to leave behind, will come back at you again."

"With life, there is nothing that one can gain without risking something," I had replied. "Perhaps, I am scared, or even _terrified_."

"The great Shuuichi Minamino, terrified?" Kaitou was intrigued.

"If I wanted, then I would find a human girl," I stared at the ground where the grass stopped against the cement sidewalk. "So that it would please my family and lower the chance of anyone _knowing_ about my other life. If she were a... _demon_ or someone that already is connected, then the chances of being found out will double--no, triple depending on the girl's personality."

"Well, I feel bad for any girl that likes you," he frowned.

"That's many girls, Kaitou," I chuckled.

"No, I mean, _really_, likes you." He was referring to Kanna, who would frequently be seen with me around school or in the upper district. "But you're also scared that she'll get hurt, aren't you? If demons come at you at one point or another, she'll get really hurt." He was correct. "But you know, Shuuichi, I think... it'd be better if she got hurt _physically_ than getting hurt _mentally_." I made no comment as I watched him turn, leaving me with my own thoughts and answers.

Yesterday, Kanna had graduated and of course, her father was proud. I attended Tokyo University but I too recieved a call that no student would be attending for one school year as well as Kanna. Her eyes were wide though, quite excited that we would be able to spend much more time with eachother now.

Strangely too, unknown to anyone but myself, every time I would go near Kanna or her mother, I noticed an ominous feeling surround me. It warned me to stay away and as a child I remember crying as my human instincts at the time caused me to do when mother had brought me to see Kanna out of the hospital.

"Ohayo gozaimasu," I smiled warmly to my mother who was pulling on her coat while the door shut loudly after Mamori had ran out. "I assume you are going to see Hana-San?"

She smiled kindly back, "Yes, Mamori-San was throwing a fit early this morning. Hatanaka was just able to keep him home until now, telling him to leave the hospital in silence." She covered her mouth as she chuckled. "We'll probably be late, but I promise to be home to make dinner."

"Of course, mother," Shuuchi politely dipped his head a small bow. "I will see you then, I presume?" He held the door open as she left.

"_Shu-Nii!" she laughed as she chased after him. He ran with fast agility around the forest, as if he lived there his whole life. "Slow down!"_

_Shuuichi gave a small smile, doing as he was told knowing that her six-year old human body wouldn't able to keep up. Her hands reached out at him and a large smile danced on her face. Just barely, her small fingers grazed against his skin as she tripped and fell to the ground. Trembling as she got to her knees, tears started to swell in her eyes while blood rushed to her cheeks and nose. "Oh, no, don't cry Kanna." He crouched before her, gently brushing off the dirt._

"_It hurts," she whimpered holding her hands out. Shuuichi blew at the scratched hands, carefully brushing away the remaining pebbles and dirt._

"_Okay, how about I give you a head start now? I'll count to ten and you can run." He smiled. Sniffling, Kanna nodded in agreement, jumping to her feet before running the opposite direction. "One--Two--!" He yelled after her. Sighing, he shook his head before frowning at her disappearing figure. Was he getting too soft on these humans? Before so, he would have never played with her with such kindness. But he owed it to her mother, and Kanna for she had watched his father die so horribly._

_No, perhaps he really was too soft. Showing pity and concern for this child was nothing he would have done in the Makai. Never._

_The last he showed such pity was several hundred years ago, when demons still roamed the human world…_

**Reviews are GREATLY appreciated! So leave one! It helps with the progress xD**

Um... wow... This took FOREVER to make T-T

But you do now know how horrible my writers block was... . It was like "Okay, so what should happen after this part... UMM"

yeah, I really do apologize on how late this came out. There was also the fact that school is being a crappy loser. :P

I have writers block on all my other stories too, so don't expect any of them to be updated soon. Anyways, it'll be easier with this one now that I've gotten past it xD

**XXTakaraXX - **Thank you for the review :3 And lol, you sense foreshadowing? Nice. I'm not that good of a reader or writer tho xD

**Out-Of-Control-Authoress** - Hopefully you read this chapter :D if you did, thank you for waiting so long D: I'm such a lazy, picky writer xD

**Daeth101-Fox Version** - Is she a demon? Hmm... well, let's see if she is :P

**Kitsune No Yume 89** - Confusing eh? You should try looking inside my mind--no wait, that's sorta dangerous :O

_**Thank you for all of your lovely reviews ;-; They are all wonderful and make me want to write more and faster for all of you (heart)**_


	6. Hide the Shoe

**OMG I ACTUALLY FINISHED THE THIRD CHAPTER :O**

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Winter Passed. Spring passed. It was that simple. Shuuichi spent his time with me, but most of it was spent with his friends and helping around his step dad's company. Mother stayed relatively the same with Dad visiting her every weekend with flowers before being kicked out when visiting hours were over, only forcing him to throw paper airplanes strategically into her room through her window. Of course, there were times when he would miss and hit the wall, falling down onto the sidewalk where pedestrians picked it up. Sometimes it would be a tourist and they would read the message of 'eternal love', look at my dad with their jaw dropping before calling the police for sexual assault.

The police were used to it by now.

"Kanna," Dad called me after hanging up his phone. "Are you ready?" I didn't respond to his call as I stood in front of my bed that was covered with clothing. "It's only your grandparents' home. Why do you do this every summer?"

"I want to look good," I puffed out my cheeks. "But I can't where the clothes that'll get ruined too easily. And I don't know where half of my underwear went."

"Uh.. Well," he coughed in embarrassment. "I had Shiori put them away for you. Did you check your drawers?"

I blushed, "Um, no.. Only the dryer." Quickly, I reached into my drawer and packed away my remaining needs.

"Okay, the train arrives at five, and leaves five after--"

"I know dad, I've been taking the train alone since I was seven. You don't have to remind me," I sighed glancing at my watch.

After the train ride, I found myself in the all-too-familiar setting of Hokkaido. From there, I had to take a bus to a town nearby. From the bus, I hitched a ride with a farmer, riding on the back of his tractor. Jumping off of such tractor, I was immediately greeted by several elderly people--two of which were my grandparents on my mother's side.

"Kanna!" Grandmother smiled, wrapping her arms around me.

"Look! It is little Kanna," one of her friends said. I kissed my grandmother on the cheek before grabbing the suitcase that the farmer left behind. I hugged every one of my Grandparents' friends, including my grandparents before I was dragged off to their home.

"Everyone is always happy to see you," Grandma nodded.

"I noticed that," I sighed. I was hoping that Shuuichi would come with me this summer, but I was disappointed.

"_It's been a while, you know, and you promised you'd come with me this summer. Grandpa apparently built a wall in between two of the rooms that we'd be using, getting rid of the doors that used to be there. He said it was so that we wouldn't have some kind of midnight fling he accuses us of. I find that funny and…" I faltered off, pursing my lips together at his apologetic frown. "You owe me a ton of ice cream." I crossed my arms together and pouted, glaring at him._

Was I being selfish? Definitely, but I couldn't help it. There was always something tugging at me, telling me to keep him as close for as long as possible before…

Before what?

I stopped walking, and everyone stared at me, curious.

What was it that keeps wanting me to cling onto him as if there was no tomorrow?

"Kanna?" Grandmother touched my arm. I gave her a large smile and stretched out my arms. "I'm so happy being here!" She chuckled and it seemed as if everyone else heaved a sigh of relief… why? Of course it was natural for them to be worried, but it seemed as if there was a flicker of fear in their eyes…

Were they hiding something?

"_Baa-Chama…" I sniffled. "I'm scared." Even though I was holding on to Shuuichi's arm and we shared the same futon, I had dragged him to my grandmother's room._

_She chuckled and let us crawl under the blankets with her, singing a lullaby._

A crooked smile played on my lips as I looked over the room I now found incredibly small and way too bright during the nighttime. Too lazy to organize my stuff into the empty drawers, I sprawled myself out on the cool tatami matted floors. A thin line of sweat was on my forehead and on my back… the lack of an air conditioner did not help.

Groaning and whining, I rolled around on the ground from wall to wall childishly. Grandpa owned such an old house that it was too old and unstable to change for a simple air conditioner. They had indoor plumbing and electricity… but not what's supposed to cool you off during summer.

"_One…two… three!" And the game began._

_I struggled to push my small shoe onto a tree branch while glancing around to see if anyone else saw me. I ran back to the playground, thinking that no one would find it. After everyone gather back together we immediately split up, looking for everyone else's shoe. Those who peeked at others quickly found a shoe while I simply went over to the bushes._

I slightly smiled as I walked around, looking over at the unused playground. I doubted that it would be left unused in five years, when my generation would come back with their own children. My face felt hot and my hands flew up to my presumably red cheeks. Would I have a child in five years? I would be twenty-two by then--who would be my husband? Shuuichi? Laughing out loud in embarrassment, I slapped my cheeks to calm myself down.

"_Ah! I found yours Kanna!" an older kid ran to the swings. Then under a bush, I found a white shoe that belonged to Shuuichi. Smiling I grabbed it and ran back to home base as well. He always hid it there--for me._

I stopped and gently touched the leaves of the now large bush. Shuuichi had always hid his shoe here so I would find it, making sure I wouldn't left out and be made fun of.

"_Everyone here?" The oldest child called out. He was Ginta, a thirteen year old boy with his chest out, hands at his hips and standing atop of a large rock. Shuuichi was twelve, and I was ten at the time. Everyone glanced at each other, looking over all the faces._

"_Tomo is missing!"_

"_Tomo!"_

"_Gone?"_

"_Missing?"_

"_Not here!"_

"_Quiet!" Gina yelled. "Everyone go look! Yumi, go tell the adults!" A fellow eight year old girl nodded hastily, listening to her brother before running off._

_The remainder of us scattered like mice being revealed of their hiding place. My instincts of hiding took me to an old wooden behind my grandparents' home. Peering inside, I didn't see Tomo. It was dark and dusty inside and opening the door had me in a coughing fit a few seconds. In the back corner was a black box that seemed to be bound with rope and strips of cloth. In the dark, I could still make out how _red_ the cloth was in contrast against the black box. Something inside of me seemed to leap, almost _dance_ every time I would lay my eyes on it. And every summer I came here and happen to come to this shack, I would _always_ end up looking at it. I walked closer and closer, like I did in the times before. Thought, before I went close enough to touch it, Shuuichi appeared grabbing a hold of my hand._

"_Let's go!" He said that summer. "They found Tomo."_

Now I found myself at the entrance again, staring at the ominous black box. I held a flashlight in my hand but the box itself was behind another box so the flashlight couldn't exactly reach it.

"_You'll get hurt here." Shuuichi would warn me._

I looked behind me, thinking he would miraculously appear behind me. This was the first time that I had come here to the shack without Shuuichi being here. Shuuichi wouldn't be able to stop me--and besides, if the shack held up this long with Grandpa and Grandma rummaging through it for the past who-knows-how-many-years, then it'll stand up to me.

"_You look angry_," I would say to him, touching his narrowed eyebrows. _"Were you worried about me?_"

Slowly, I walked over the boxes and strewn out old toys or clothes. Idiotically, I bumped my head into a shelf, seeing as how my eyes were fixated on only the small box. Hissing I dropped the flashlight and touched my forehead--no bump.

_His green eyes would soften and he'd say_, _"Everyone would get sad if you got hurt."_

Unable to find the flashlight that had rolled beneath other cases and boxes, I went on towards the back.

"_What about you?"_ _I would ask._

Finally, I reached the box. With a proud smile I pulled the cloth and rope off of the box. Suddenly, a sick, churning feeling settled in my stomach along with a painful pull at the back of my neck. My heart started to race as I opened it in confusion. Inside, a small delicate glass sculpture rested. It fit perfectly into my palm and it didn't have any detail but it was still finely shaped into what was a butterfly. Even though it was simple it still seemed very much alive with the crimson color standing in contrast with the dark shadows.

A loud, eerie creaking snapped me back to reality. Suddenly a sharp, heavy object fell atop of me. My breathe was knocked out of my and I lied painfully on the ground as I kept being hit with more weight--and with each weight came more and more pain cutting into my back. It seemed as though the shack had collapsed…

_He seemed a bit hesitant with his answer the last time he was here with me. "Yeah," he finally concluded. "I would."_

That was when I was twelve and he was fourteen--the final year before he grew his hair out.

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**REVIEWS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED :3**

** you can also IM me at Kawaii_Yuri903 (at) Hotmail. com**

** my AIM is Aya Silver963  
**

So yeah, I know, that took wayyy to long. but hey, I'm trying my best. writer's block really sucks D: and I really didn't want this event to happen so early... but.... yeah.... whateverrrrrrrr~

Anyways, this chapter is 3 pages! THREE go ahead and copy and paste to check d: lol

REVIEWERS (not in any particular order D:) :

**Isabella of the Night** - longer? sooner? I wish I could D: but school sucks. separation anxiety sucks. nomnomnomnomnomnOM- i eat u XD (-see THIS is why i shouldn't be given sugar)

**midnightsprite** - you... gave... the awesomest reviews ever XD I laughed so hard. "EK!" ... "MORE!" xD you remind me of my friend Megan when she's given sugar (oh nOES)

**Kaori Minamino - **"Why have I not read this before!?!" - yes, why HAVE you not read this before O_. roflmao anyways... yeah.... thanks for the review

**WishingWanderer** - lol. well, here's the next chapter XD thanks for the review

**xenocanaan** - interesting name. anyways, thanks for the review and.... well... sorry for the long wait

**Moonlight-Rose19** - thanks for the good luck, I'll be needing it D: thanks for the review :3

**D101** - hello ol' buddeh' ol' fan of mine lol. thanks for the review! let's see if your theory is true....

**lilypop8** - did u review AFTER chp was published or before? if it was before, sorry for missing u and not mentioning you in the last chappy D: thanks for the review :3

**Lunalom** - awww dont be dying D: lol - XD - thanks for the review :3

-_HEARTS FOR EVERYONE! please please pleaseeee leave ur reviews in the MOST RECENT CHAPTER so I don't have to go scrounging around my email and the review page and my chapters to make sure I'm not leaving anyone out D: You fans are very dear to me and help me write lol_

Until next time- Ja ne~


	7. Seizure

OMG ITS THE FOURTH CHAPTER!!!!!!! APSIJDWOADJALWJEPORQOJDOAWJDLJSDAD :3

no it actually doesn't mean anything XD

_**Shuuichi's POV**_

"She has severe cuts in her back, but it was all… clean," the doctor fidgeted looking over the papers. "She'll live but I don't know how to explain--"

"So she's okay?" Mamori cried.

"Yes--"

"What is it that you are having trouble explaining?" I asked.

"Her cuts seemed to have some coordination to it and under surgery a lot of _skin_ was _missing_. They looked as if they were strategically cut off... the muscles themselves on her back weren't even damaged. We bandaged her and stop the bleeding." He shook his head. "In a few months, there should only be scars left. You will understand then."

_Scars…?_ I thought. A sick feeling entered my gut, and I my fox instincts started to cry; get away! My demonic instincts snarled instead, saying; Kill!

This left me utterly confused, why couldn't I think straight?

"Doctor," Mamori spoke up, just only slightly calmer. "Where did she get hurt?"

"Her grandparents informed me that they had found her under the debris of an old shack--" I paid attention no longer as my blood ran cold.

"_Don't go in there Kanna," I would grab a hold of her hand._

"_It's dangerous." _

"_The shack will fall."_

"…_you'll get hurt…"_

I had repeated my warnings over and over again. But it seemed that they had no effect on the outcome.

_---_

_**Kanna's POV**_

My whole body was stiff and I struggled to move. An air mask was uncomfortably strapped onto my face while my whole body was sore from resting on a rigid hospital bed… wait, _hospital_ bed?

The itchy blankets, linoleum floor, and the way too bright of lights along with the overload of beeping monitors completely screamed hospital. Not to mention the nausea of too many painkillers being in my veins. The ugly stench of Clorox and sickness also held up a similar sign.

Groaning, I weakly pulled off my air mask and struggled to sit up. "Nurse!" I called in a coarse voice. "Nurse!" This time my voice cracked.

A woman ran in with her mouth open. "Doctor! She's awake!" she announced as she ran back outside instead of actually answering to my call.

In a matter of seconds, several doctors flooded in--there was one for my bones, blood, muscles, gashes--etcetera… It took who-knows-how-many-hours for every imaginable physical test to be done and over with. At the end, I was poked and prodded so many times even an alien would probably find it horrible.

I was exhausted but I agreed to see my dad--and a few extra visitors. My heart was ecstatic seeing Shuuichi walk into the room closely behind his mother while my dad practically jumped me. The dancing monitor didn't mind telling the whole world either.

"Kanna!" He cried and sobbed and he crushed me in his arms.

"Mamori-San," Shiori chastised while she and Shuuichi pried him off of me. Wheezing for air I laughed. "Are you in pain, Kanna?"

I shook my head. "No…what happened? No one would tell me anything."

"You don't remember what happened?" Dad asked with narrowed brows. "You were found under a collapsed shack--the old one behind your grandparents home." My mouth slightly opened and formed an "o" as I began to remember. "What were you _doing_ in there?! You almost died from the blood loss!" He was about to continue but Shiori touched his shoulder.

"Let her be, Mamori-San." she smiled. "Would you like something to eat?" I nodded eagerly, quickly realizing that the strange growling sound I heard for a while was actually from me. She dragged Dad away while Shuuichi stayed by my side.

"You're awfully quiet," I said looking up at him, but before I could take a whole look at his face I saw his hair and the ceiling. He had wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug. The monitor again started to go crazy. Surprised, he pulled back, glancing at the monitor and then at my red face.

His hands stayed put on my forearms while his eyes were narrowed and stern. "I _warned_ you over and over again to not go into that shack."

"I-I know…" I was embarrassed and guilty. Looking away from him, I dropped my chin and stared at my hands.

"I--…" for once he seemed to be at a loss of words as he contemplated something. Again, that strange _ancient_ and _wise_ look crossed into his eyes, seeming to hold many more years of experience than my own grandparents. Even though this confused me, I still thought about what he may be feeling towards me. He should have guessed by now--thanks to the monitor--that I _liked_ him. Does he still think of me as a childhood friend? Or did his new knowledge of my feelings change something? Was he even thinking about those kinds of matters at all?

"Tired," I mumbled.

"What?" he didn't catch it.

"I'm tired."

Shuuichi stared at me for a few more moments before getting up. "I'll pass that message on."

As he walked away it felt as if were of two separate worlds. I couldn't find my voice as I watched him leave. Something had drastically changed between the two of us, and it seemed as though I was the only one not getting the memo. I lied back down and pulled the itchy cover over me and fell into a restless sleep.

_I pushed the blade into them--not thinking--not planning. My need to run from reality coursed through me violently. I swung the knife around me, moving at almost an inhuman speed, dodging all of the swords. The blood nearly blinded my sight and painfully seared my abliity to smell. My whole world became red and I smelled and tasted nothing but blood._

_The wouldn't stop appearing, coming after me with their swords and other types of weapons. In fact, they used anything available to them._

_"Get-out-of-my-way!" I snarled as several of them dropped to the ground with others that had fallen before them. I wasn't getting tired, not at the least bit--just more and more aggravated with more energy. Where was he? Where?_

_I looked everywhere but I couldn't find him--...who was I looking for now? My movements slowed until I came to a complete stop and everyone--and everything--melted and faded away in to darkness._

_What was going on?_

_---_

**Shuuichi's POV**

I watched the nurses and a couple doctors rush in to the room. They shouted commands that didn't enter my ears as I watched Kanna shake violently on her bed. Her eyes were wide and I could see them slowly start to turn red.

Mamoru was held back by a couple nurses and I as they held Kanna down, trying to control her seizing. My blood ran cold because her eye color had turned from a dark brown to a bright red hue before she closed her eyes the moment the seizing passed. He body stayed motionless as her heart seemed to have stopped as well. Nurses shocked her three times before it started to beat again.

This was happening to Kanna because I had stubbornly refused to go with her this summer. She went to her Grandparents' home and opened the black box. She didn't heed my warning and ended up at the hospital in a coma for two months... but I couldn't blame her. She was human. Her curiosity got the best of her and it didn't help that the box was actually controlling her--no, not the box. It was her ancestor's plan for this to have happened.

All of it.

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**_PSST! REVIEWS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED! :3_**

_you may contact me at _**Kawaii_Yuri903 (at) hotmail (dot) com**

**picture of kanna kawaiiyuri(dot)deviantart(dot)com/art/Mirror-105686512/  
**

So.... yeah...? What do you think?

I spent about a few days writing the dream sequence. I couldn't decide on what to write--wether it was a peaceful dream of looking up at the stars or if it should have been a nice family memory--until I was like "wait... why does it have to be a good memory?!" so TADA

mass killings!! WOO!!!

...i should see a therapist -.-;;

annyyywwaaayyyssss, REVIEWERS (in no particular order)** WHY DO YOU ALL HAVE SUCH LONG AND DIFFICULT NAMES?!!??!!???  
**

**DaAmazingMeepers** - RAWR the ":3" is mine! ...anyways, ahem, awesome name ^_^ thanks for the review

**TallyYoungBlood** - what is happening to her? IS she a demon? IS SHE? well, let's see lol

**Isabella of the Night** - thanks for the review! :3 *bite* nomnomnomnomnommmm :3

**xenocanaan** - no dont cry! ima cry if u do! ;-; thanks for the review btw

**Lunalom** - yes actually, the shack did collapse. sorry about the confusion ^_^;; thanks for the review

**pinkrollingstone** - im actually quite proud of my layout so far ^_^ thanks for the review

**WishingWanderer** - TADA! THE NEXT CHAPTER :3 thanks for the review and all ur questions will be answered later/soon :3

**D-101** - rofl sorry for taking so long to bring out that u forgot it ^_^;; anyways, thanks for ther review


	8. Butterflies

_I am just so. F'-n. Proud. :O_

**Shuuichi's POV** (because it's always fun to eavesdrop in to his thoughts ^^)

"Her neurology may have been damaged due to the seizure but we won't know for sure until she wakes up," the doctor scratched his head. "Honestly, we're not sure what exactly caused the seizure, it may have been due to some infection. There's a possibility that we missed something during the MRIs this morning."

Mamoru looked like he was about to break. It was understandable; his wife was on the brink of death and Kanna seemingly also seesawed on that edge as well. "You should rest," Mother encouraged him. The bags appearing under her eyes that she tried to conceal with makeup, also pointed out that she too was anxious and worried.

"May I stay by Kanna?" I asked but I made sure to make it sound more of a demand than a question.

"Oh, uh, of course," The doctor stumbled over his words, unable to make out what my eyes were saying as I stared hard at him. Medically, I knew they would have said no, with the excuse of causing stress since I was the last one with her earlier.

"Thank you," I gave him calm, charming smile. He only gave a shaky nod as I entered back in to the room. I suppose she thought that I finally figured out her feelings due to the monitor. Staying with her put both of our families in danger--but it was not because of the demons of Makai.

They would be in danger from Kanna herself.

"..._the past you so desire to leave behind, will come back at you again_..." Kaitou's words echoed in my mind.

- - - - -

**Kanna's POV**

Shuuichi left while I was still unconscious, returning to help with his step-dad's company. Dad was literally dragged back to work by his co-workers and Shuuichi's mother left with her son.

I was left in the care of my Grandparents again, who cried deeply on my return from the hospital. The other elderly of the town received me kindly again, but this time it seemed to have a strange, icy edge. They smiled and gave me words of comfort and worry, but their eyes told a completely cold story.

"Kanna, let me help wash your back." Grandmother offered, walking into the old-fashioned bath house.

"Thank you, Grandma," I smiled allowing her to push my hair to the side and remove my bandages. I felt dry scabs be pulled off and my gag reflex threatened to kick in but I was able to control myself. She scrubbed gently and I knew all the scabbing went away and all that was left was scars. I imagined that my back was now completely disfigured, or at least left with strange markings. Grandmother gave out a loud gasp, dropping the wet sponge. Her hands seemed to trace the scarring on my back and it felt as if it was shaped like diamonds of some sort.

Gently massaging my shoulders she started to cry, "I'm so sorry Kanna. I'm so sorry. I should have gotten rid of it."

"Rid of what," I asked turning around. Her lips formed a deep frown and in her eyes I could tell that she was in complete fear. Was it of me?

"The box," she said before leaving me in a rush.

Stepping awkwardly out of the tub, I walked over to the steamy mirror. I twisted my head as far back as I possible could to look at what the mirror revealed to me. On my back were scars that resembled a butterfly. I was left completely amazed at the distinct shapes that were left behind from the accident. Two feelers came down on my shoulders and the jagged-but curved- wings went up my shoulder blades and down to my waste. A diamond shape body was in the center, in between the wings.

My only reaction was a twitching, raised eyebrow with my mouth hanging open.

"Baba!" I screamed. "Obaa-San!" Grabbing a robe and pulling it on, I ran after my Grandmother who I found talking with Grandfather who wore a grim face. "What is this? What's going on?" I was beyond what my mind could comprehend. This was something that my Grandparents knew about. That everyone in this small town had knowledge of.

"A curse," although these words were simple and quickly spoken, the way they left Grandpa's mouth sent chills down my spine. "--Was laid upon us with the death of a disgraceful ancestor. With the inheritance of the Crimson Butterfly one experiences much torment and the lust for vengeance. The thirst to spill blood overwhelms its poor victim and will never be satisfied." His voice seemed to echo around me as my heart pounded in my chest as terror seized me by the throat.

"Who," I swallowed, forcing the words out of my mouth. "Who is the vengeance for? What was the cause of this anger?" Even though I was scared of the monster I was apparently going to turn in to, I couldn't help but wonder where this anger flared up from.

Maybe…

Was it…

…from a scarring sadness?

Grandfather slowly shook his head. "That is not known."

- - - - -

**Shuuichi's POV**

Her death, unfortunately, was not quick and painless. She had the potential to be equal to me, and for that I respected her enough to have wanted the opposite of what had really become of her. Now, though, guilt hangs on those memories as I have changed from the way I was. I was similar but with different morals.

I see and think differently—not everything and everyone is out to get me.

…At least, not anymore.

For a moment, I strained to remember her name but the realization of never learning it made me chuckle. She was a challenge but that didn't leave respect to really have the need to know who she was. A simple human that had attained demonic powers was all she was. All she could be.

Picking up a book that contained stories of people throughout Japanese history, I flipped to the table of contents. I found the topic of killers and went to the appointed page, skimming through paragraphs and sub-categories until I found the one I was looking for.

_The night, pitch black, is her scene,_

_With the moon, full and gleaming white, she appears._

_There, the slim figure of a woman stands,_

_Her kimono, torn and tattered,_

_With patterns of foreign unknowns,_

_Dirty and red with blood is her attire._

_Her eyes gleam crimson in the dark,_

_Looking like those of a monster's._

_She jumps and she leaves the sight of a butterfly in the air,_

_Before disappearing through the window,_

_Of where her poor victim sleeps._

_I watch and wait,_

_And see the scarlet blood scatter out the window,_

_Soon followed out by the Crimson Butterfly,_

_Holding a sack that was dripping red._

_I see her face, expecting a proud smile,_

_But her eyes were full of tears,_

_And her lips were curled into a frown.._

I shut the book, closing my eyes for a moment. Opening it once again I went to a different page, one that contained a poem that talked of the same girl, but written by another.

_Once shattered, now I have mended her,_

_Once broken and bloody, I helped fix her._

_She laughs now,_

_She calls out to me to play._

_As she watches over my being,_

_Proudly safeguarding me,_

_I keep her heart safe._

_Although, at times, her eyes turn cold,_

_And her lips curl down,_

_Her need to hold the blade close at times,_

_Do not scare me._

_Her fear of losing another,_

_Consumes her entire being,_

_And I fear that she may start to choke,_

_On the day I fall onto my deathbed._

I walked a few shelves over to another section, pulling another book. It was the recordings of a man whose name was lost in records, but known to have held a certain amount of status.

_I took in a child whose family was lost. An orphan with the ability to join her distant cousins was abandoned by those exact same people. Her eyes are sharp but full of fear, and her lips quiver as if holding back screams and cries._

_I cannot leave her to the authorities for fear of her well being as she is barely fourteen years. She has taken quite to me, clinging to my hakama, grasping my sleeves or jumping behind me to hide her self. There are times in which she touches my hair with wide eyes, curious of why I had cut it so short. A child, that is all she is, but in the eyes of hungry men she would be sold to a brothel if not protected._

_No, that is a lie. She can protect herself well, though she holds the blade haphazardly with a novice's grip. Her hands do not tremble and she does not hesitate to strike in order to protect my being--_

I felt a vibration from my phone and I looked at the caller; _Mother_. "Moshi moshi," I answered with a light tone. "Yes, mother?"

"_Shuuichi,_" her voice came worriedly. "_Have you seen Mamoru at any time?_"

"No mother, I can't say I have," I answered calmly, in order to help her. "Has he disappeared?"

"_Yes, I received a call from his brothers at work. He's gone… I can't leave work at the moment, are you busy? Could you go check on Kanna and see if he's gone there?_"

I hesitated before answering.

- - - - -

**Kanna's POV **(Gasp, you don't get to hear his answer D**:**)

I sat in my room thinking about what I was told. All that could be explained was explained in a few minutes; in just a few sentences.

Because of my stupidity, I was going to become a monster.

_"So... what do I do now?" I recalled asking. "If I'm going to become a monster..."_

_Grandmother couldn't hold herself together longer and started to cry. Grandfather put his hand on her back and stared at me with narrowed eyes. "The long reign of the warlord Nobunaga Oda had come to an end by his defeat. He, who was known as the demon king of war refused to be completely defeated--"_

_"And performed seppuku," I finished his sentence with a trembling voice._

I could name at least five things off the top of my head that I could use to kill myself with; the sharp craft scissors over in the box at the corner sitting idly on the low leveled desk. The cotton blanket folded up in the closet or the bottles of copper and brass cleaners out under the deck. Propane gas could also be a possibility--oh, and the kitchen knives just in general. Sharply inhaling I slapped myself.

No, I had to keep a hold of myself. How would dad react if I really did die? From an accident is one thing, but me killing myself? Would Baba and JiiJii tell him why? Shiori would also throw a fit, wondering what 'drove me to the edge'... What about Shuuichi? Would he cry for me? Would he come close? I don't ever remember him crying when his father died--and I was just a childhood friend who, I doubted, that he even had feelings for that came anywhere close to being more.

I shook my head furiously-- just the idea of Grandfather wanting me to kill myself was just too incomprehensible! And another thing, why did I believe him in the first place? Just because the elderly was being paranoid due to my scar, why should I have to join in on the madness?

Starting to panic, I realized that I needed to leave. To go back to the city and—

--do what?

The reason to run away was obvious but the sudden urge to find something was starting to choke me. Someone, somewhere, I had to find them.

Breathing heavily my vision blurred and I became dizzy, watching the world start to spin for me. Then I heard my name being called by someone.

"Kanna," my dad called. Pushing myself up to a sitting position I willed more energy out of my body in order to pull on my clothes. "Kanna," he seemed worried about me, and I could hear his voice coming closer.

"Mamoru," I heard the opening and closing of a door, signaling that grandfather was going out to meet him—to stop him. "What are you doing here? How are you going to pay for your family if you keep running from work?"

"Ah, I was worried, I wanted to take Kanna back home, Father." By the time he had finished with his sentence, I had pulled on my panties, pants and socks, but now I was struggling with my bra clasp.

"Kanna is sick, the city air is impure! Do you want her sicker? This is why I tell you to take my daughter-in-law to a country hospital, but you don't listen!" I heard a _whap_ sound, and it seemed as though Grandpa had hit dad with a stick.

"I'm sorry, Father!" I heard him running away from him.

"Dad," I cried out finally pulling on a sweater. I ran out to him and he gratefully wrapped his arms around me.

"Kanna," he smothered me with his large arms. "Let's go home, you're not sick, right?" he looked at grandpa with a glare. "For the last time father, words are just words." This confused me. What words?

Grandfather's lips made a straight line for a moment. "It is not a simple tale to scare you away from the shack, Mamoru. You were not affected because you were not a girl!" Chills were sent down my spine again as Grandpa stared straight at me, and his dark eyes seemed vaguely familiar to me.

"Enough," Father growled pulling me away. "Come on, Kanna, we're leaving. I'll buy you new clothes and whatever we're leaving behind, okay?" With his hand on my back we left. Strangely, it felt uncomfortable for someone to touch my scars but I fought the urge to push his arm away.

"Dad," I called to him in the car. "What were you two talking about? What about me being a girl?"

He slightly opened his mouth but hesitated in answering, glancing at me. With a sigh, he said, "There's this story that's told in our family in each generation. If a child of our bloodline—apparently girls only—were to touch the glass butterfly of our ancestor, they would be taken over the spirit of that ancestor. Which is all rubbish, so just ignore your grandparents and the elderly, okay?" I nodded eagerly. Why should I believe them? There's no proof that it was real. Ghosts and spirits? Ha!

- - - - -

**Shuuichi's POV**

"Yes, mother, I'm on my way at the moment," I chuckled into the phone. Gripping the steering wheel with my left hand, I held my phone with my right while resting my elbow against the window. "Actually, I see them right now." I eyed the other side of the rode where Kanna and her father looked over their car.

I narrowed my eyebrows at the split of Kanna's spirit energy that surrounded her. Part of it was blue and barely existing since she held little to no spirit power, but the red colored demon energy flickered and danced on her like electricity.

- - - - -

**Kanna's POV **(yeah, Shuuichi's was pretty short but deal with it. Go Google him and drool over his pictures if you want more Kurama-love)

Dad rummaged through the car manual, trying to figure out what was wrong. All I did was stand by the car, watching him looking back and forth from the useless booklet and the engine. "Dad, can't we just call for help?"

"I can do it," he hissed childishly.

Sighing, I leaned against the car waiting until he gave up.

The slamming of a car door from behind me caught my attention, and as I turned my head a familiar voice also said, "Need any help?" Shuuichi stood there with an amused smile.

"Shuuichi," I was surprised. Then the hospital memory of my heart monitor decided to resurface and my face immediately felt hot. With my lips wanting to pull into a large grin, I fought against the instinctual moves causing the corners of my mouth twitch up and down uncomfortably. I turned around and slapped my cheeks, noticing dad eye me with a raised brow.

"Ah," then dad's face turned red as well. "O-Of course I don't! As a man, I can fix anything—even cars!" He laughed loudly and exaggerated, trying to keep his dignity.

"Don't worry, I believe you Mamoru-San," Shuuichi smiled. "I was sent to see where you are after disappearing from work." He stood there with his usual calm smile while his green eyes seemed to hide something.

"Ah—well," Dad stammered in embarrassment before stepping away from the hood of the car. "Fine, you can fix it." I laughed as Shuuichi looked over it for a moment before twisting a knob and walking back to his car. Dad's jaw dropped. "That's all I had to do?"

Shuuichi shrugged, "It was loose so the car kept losing its connection." Dad angrily shut the hood and went to the driver's seat. "Oh, Kanna," he called when I was about to open the door.

"Yes?" I tried to keep calm but I failed miserably.

"Would you like to ride with me? I can take you home while Mamoru-San goes back to work." He motioned to his step-father's company car that he had presumably borrowed.

A knock came from dad in the car, and he signaled for me to go. Probably flushing red, I turned around and walked over to Shuuichi who held the door open for me.

In the car ride, I kept myself from looking at him, too embarrassed about the hospital incident.

"Kanna," he said. "Are you okay?" It felt as though there were several meanings behind the words but I answered with a simple 'yes'.

Then, Shuuichi gave out a gasp as he slammed down on the breaks. Adrenaline pushed through my veins as I was pushed forward. My eyes were wide and I tried to see why he had done that, but as we skidded to a halt with the tires screaming protests, I watched a large beast jump in front of us. My mouth barely had time to open in horror before I felt my seatbelt being cut while I was pulled out of the car by Shuuichi. Breathing heavily, I desperately held onto him as he carried me away from the beast as it attacked the car.

* * *

6 pages. it took me three (four?) months for 6 pages. Yeah. I know. I suck. BUT OH WELL

I moved across the country (Sakuracon 09 T^T) and then had to get used to a frikken big school where I got lost ALL THE TIME. and I have NO tv. NO cable. NO internet (mooching off of someone's wireless by figuring out their password hehehehee) and I have NO INSPIRATION

....

YES THIS IS ALL YOU GET

Jinxedpixie - planned? yep. kill them? how? they're already dead ... O_o

Lunalom - LMAO! hairy legs? nope. By genetics, most eastern asians have not hairy bodies like western peoples. The hairiness _is_ more common in Jap, Tai and Viet than Kor's (not too sure of Chi's) As a Korean myself, I have not hairy legs or arms. By default, everyone in the world as hairy armpits (and well, down _there_), but lets not get into that. xD For Kanna, though, I made her less hairy like me, soooooo she gets the same amount of hair as me; NONE! XD

The A-A - yes, I shortened your name. what of it? xD Thanks for the review~

Tally - muahahaa, second victim who's name I have shortened :3 annnyywwaays, this is longer~ hope you like it. Can't promise that the next one will be as long. or even reach two pages-- what questions?

Meepers - and here is more!

xeno - hmmmm maybe? maybe not.....

Kitty - um, interesting name... lol thank you for the review. I'm trying my best to update as fast as I can, but life tends to throw hard balls and I tend to run away from them D: and I absolutely love making suspense

Kaori - yes, how DID he know? hmmm.... well, we'll just have to see (i already kno, kufufu~)

D101- of course you can save it ^^ when I get a scanner again I'll put more up when I can


	9. Dead or Alive

What It Means To Be Human

**Kanna's POV**

The monster attacked the car, but only briefly since it seemed to search for something while slapping it over onto its side. I had trouble breathing and I could only grip onto Shuuichi's shirt in desperate fear.

Suddenly, everything seemed to slow down with the beast's head dragging towards us while Shuuichi's hand lifted unhurriedly. It was then I realized I had no control over my body as I stared back at the beast whose eyes shined an incredible blue that sent anger and confusion through my body.

_I know those eyes!_ I screamed in my mind, wailing silently in confusion and fear.

_The man's back was to the moon causing me to see only a dark figure standing next to me. His black hair was left untied and wavered behind him in waves of black strands while he ran his fingers through mine._

"_Beautiful," he whispered but I was much too focused on his eyes. Those eyes that were so blue…_

…_So blue…_

…_So blue…_

The memory that was not mine frightened me and I watched my own hands grasp a wet stick and hold it up towards the beast. Time continued again and the beast stated to charge at me.

That was when a hand reached out from the shadows at my feet, grabbing my hands and pulling me down.

- - - - -

**Shuuichi's POV**

"Kanna," I barely finished her name before she disappeared into the shadows. Quickly turning towards the beast to retain my guard I realized that it, too, had gone away. I stood and took in the scene around me. Deeply imprinted tire tracks led from atop of the hill while the car I had borrowed from Hatanaka lied on its side. One of the doors was half ripped off while the front glass was all shattered and broken. I glanced at my watch and I knew I had a limited amount of time before anyone noticed the tire tracks, which would then lead to the trashed car.

I grimaced since the one that had pulled Kanna away took her to the Makai. Even I, who had lived for thousands of years, had yet to reach any form of a boundary in that world. Although I recognized her kidnapper's energy as of that of a high class demon, Kanna could have been taken anywhere.

I thought of my choices; I could seek help with Yusuke who was still training in the Makai but it would be rude of me to interrupt him—though he probably _wanted_ some distraction. I could seek Hiei's assistance as Kanna, after all, was still considered human. He could search out for her during his rounds for any humans that had wandered across the gates. Then the thought of Koenma also appeared and I resolved to pay a visit to the spirit world first.

- - - - -

**Kanna's POV**

A child's song played in the dark that surrounded me, soft and sweet its words echoed. I lied there, curled up in fetal position in the warm and comfortable shadows.

… _Deta deta tsuki ga_

_Marui marui manmarui_

_bon no you na tsuki ga…*_

"…tsuki ga," I mumbled opening my eyes, ready for the sight of the moon but it didn't greet me as I awoke. Surprised, I quickly sat up and took in what was around me. The sky was completely covered in red and purple clouds while a never-ending race of lightning came down to strike a rock formation every now and then; some were close while others were not. Only a few of them made thunder clap sounds while the others stayed silent. There was no wind—or at least not at the moment—but I felt both cool and warm. It was a very uncomfortable feeling, as if the temperature always stayed the same here.

An inhuman roar that didn't belong to any animal I knew of came from behind me. Turning around I saw a large monster whose body was covered entirely by scales and his mouth was large and hanging open with saliva dripping out. I noticed two small black eyes on both sides of the face (totally in four) but they were barely the size of my finger nails. The monster stalked taller than me by a foot or two.

"_It smells like human_," it talked in confusion, their voice was raspy, "_but its energy is of demon!"_

"_Human_?" more monsters appeared around me. "_And where is that servant of Mukuro? Hmm/? Nowhere! No where at all!_" Cackling ensued around me as one after another the monsters started to come to realizations that I didn't understand. "_Food! Flesh of a human! I haven't eaten for so long…_"

I could barely whimper in fear as I jumped to my feet and started to run away from the forming crowd. I heard the thumping of their feet as they ran after me along with my own heart, beating and pounding in my chest and all the way up in my ears. _Help me_, I cried silently as I ran. There were times I stumbled to jump over small crevices or rocks but I dared not turn around in fear I would trip. _Somebody help me!_

That was when my foot slipped into a crevice, and half of my body fell into it. A swipe came at me, destroying part of the rocks around me. I gave out a scream as the footing I had found beneath suddenly gave out. The monsters disappeared from my view and the last I saw were the rocks and the shadows.

--

I found myself in complete darkness as I tried to walk around. Several times I tripped or bumped into obstacles. They seemed to be trees or rocks, but I kept going even though I had received several cuts on myself.

Soon, I collapsed onto flat, level ground, unable to feel my legs. They were like dead weights.

_Shuuichi..._ I thought. He was the last person I saw before I was pulled through. His gentle green eyes became sharp and menacing; glaring at what had a hold of me. _He knows something._

"There seems to be someone here," a child's voice echoed around me.

"Perhaps it is the girl," another voice, deeper, spoke. I knew for certain that it was of a man's.

"The one that Youko told us of?" the child spoke again.

A light spilled around me and my eyes widened at the sight. There were monsters and people all around me. Vines grew around them, but I could make it out that they were of stone. They were all in different positions; sleeping, sitting, running, fighting, crawling--and I was starting to be one of them.

I paled, looking to my legs; slowly, they were turning into stone. My shirt had slightly lifted up and I realized that my waist was grey and hard.

"I'm quite amazed that you are still mobile," a man appeared in front of me, looking down at me with a calm smile that was similar to Shuuichi's. No, he wasn't looking--he could hear me. The man was pale and tall, with his eyes closed. Several ears and horns accompanied his look, but either way he still had a high, aristocratic feel about him. At his side stood a boy with black hair as well, his eyes were innocent but held great power and knowledge.

"Are you Kanna?" the boy asked. I nodded in response.

"I am Yomi," the man said, "_Shuuichi_'s old friend."

The man came to my side and freed me from turning into stone, explaining that this cave served as protection. He led me out of the cave and I gratefully followed him to what was a large, strange castle-like fortress of some sort. It was hard to describe as spikes shot out in rings on its watchtowers and walls. More monsters of different forms stood to the side, showing respect to this strange man and boy. The child then parted after glancing at me, going through another hallway.

"Here," the man opened a door, smiled at me, and then walked away.

I cautiously peeked in and saw Shuuichi standing there, a calm smile on his face that was almost similar to the one who had escorted and save me. "Shuuichi," I breathed out in joy and wrapped my arms around his neck while slightly jumping. He chuckled and patted my back before pushing me away to examine me.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly but still calm. I was about to respond but my energy completely drained out of me and I collapsed in his arms while my consciousness proceeded to dip into darkness.

- - - - -

**Shuuichi's POV**

I set her down on the bed in the room. "I'm sorry that I had to do that, Kanna," I apologized even though she wouldn't hear me. Without turning around I continued, "Thank you, Yomi. I know it was strange of me to have asked you for this favor but this…"

Yomi cut me off, standing at door. "She has a peculiar mix of energy, I understand well, Youko. The girl is merely possessed, that's all."

I sat on a chair and stared at Kanna's unmoving form before slightly shaking my head. "No, she is not possessed." Yomi stayed silent in curiosity. "This girl was not the child I saw being born, but that will only be true if I can figure out a couple more things."

I took in her actions from my memories.

Kanna breaths, can eat, sleep, bleed, and can cry.

She feels pain, joy, love, and hate. Every part of her was human and alive. Blood coursed through her veins, pumped on by her heart. What I had learned today did not make any sense.

I recalled the meeting with Koenma who was very pleased about my visit since he was about to be literally drowning in piles of paperwork due to King Yama's negligence.

"_Kurama," Koenma had greeted me happily. "Well, at least someone's nice enough to take time to visit."_

_I smiled but I said, "I came to ask for a favor." The new King of Reikai sat patiently. "I would like the records of a human named Shikusa, Kanna."_

_Koenma hesitated but didn't ask for further answers; he trusted me enough to understand. He pressed a button and called for another soul reaper, Ayame, who was also his assistant. "Ayame, please look up the file of Shikusa, Kanna of Ningenkai."_

_She nodded and asked, "Is she alive? What is her birth date?" I answered and she left through the wall that she had first come through._

_I stood waiting for an hour, having a small chat with Koenma who diligently worked at his papers at the same time. Finally, impatient on my behalf, Koenma jabbed away at his button calling for Ayame. We waited for several more minutes before she came through and bowed deeply. "I apologize, Lord Koenma but due to incorrect information, I had searched wrong."_

"_What," Koenma was confused at his assistant's mistake as she usually made little to no mistakes. She produced a file from her arms and set it on the desk before bowing again and leaving. Koenma, in turn, handed the file to me._

**NAME**; Shikusa, Kanna

**AGE; **5 years 3 months 12 days

**HEIGHT; **3' 2"

**WEIGHT; **34lb

_I chuckled and my lips curled into a smile. But as I was about to remind Koenma to keep up with his records, my eyes saw another line that stopped me;_

**STATUS;** deceased

* * *

***song: **_Rising, rising is the moon,  
Large & round, large & round, round round one,  
Plate-like full moon will rise soon._

_**REVIEWS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED (and sought after)**_

another picture! YAY!! www(dot)kawaiiyuri(dot)deviantart(dot)com/art/Human-Fanfic-art-122851101

**I've noticed I've only gotten 4 reviews... I'm so sad ;-;**

**D-101** - Thanks for the review again! lmao, or should I say PM? well, anyways, here's the answer to your question

**c****hocolaterox - **I must agree with your sn. well, thanks for your review (heart)

**Lunalom** - lol, I know, right?

**Pissed Off Irish Chick** - .... what the f* is up with your SN, C? haha, well, what did you think of this? oh, well, then agian, you already read more than half of this chapter today during math class but... uh, well, still.... hrm.... ^_^Uu


	10. Where are the Tears?

Hey, so, it seems that the links for the picture I put in didn't work so here it is again... actually, it's two this time ^.~

and, yes, I drew them both :3

http:/kawaiiyuri(dot)deviantart(dot)com/art/Reflections-123289494

http:/kawaiiyuri(dot)deviantart(dot)com/art/Human-Fanfic-art-122851101

* * *

**Kanna's POV**

_"Nii-San," I called turning to a boy who seemed no older than fifteen. He repeatedly swung his shinai up and down, over and over, stepping forward and stepping back. The shinai came down rhythmically and very controlled. "You're working so hard, I'm sure that Father will very proud when he comes home."_

_He stopped and wiped the forming sweat from his forehead with his sleeve and winked at me. "You think? Soon he'll start training me with grandfather's sword, and then I can call myself a samurai, just like our ancestors."_

_Then the sound of rolling wheels and the neigh of horses caught our attention and at once we knew our father was home. I got to my feet and set down the ceramic tea cup before walking after my brother. The moment he walked through the doors, I couldn't get my feet to move. Confused, I looked down to my feet and didn't see the wooden floor of the dojo anymore. Everything was covered in blood and it came all the way up to my knees. I started to panic but my legs were stuck, and glued to the ground. I gasped and tried to scream for help but my voice had also disappeared. Then I noticed the flames, dancing atop of the pool of blood. The fire was being fed by the red liquid and charged at me, coming closer and closer-_

I awoke with a start and from the pains that clawed away at my legs and shoulders. My chest was tight but I tried to relax and forget about the fire. Then I shivered from the frost that nipped at me and the fact that I didn't know that boy who I talked with moments before the blood and fire. I've never been in the kind of dojo I was sitting at, sipping away at tea and wearing a kimono. That was not my brother because I was an only child. That memory was not mine.

Groaning in pain I tried to look around me. Blood—there was so much blood. It trickled from my legs and was smeared or splattered onto broken shards of glass. I pushed my hair from my face to take a better view. Then I noticed Shuuichi, lying next to me with one arm beneath my head and the other across my back. His head dripped blood and his clothing was torn in a few places with little sparkling glass pieces embedded into the cloth and in his skin. I tried to move but I hissed in pain as I had accidentally pushed my legs deeper onto the remaining glass of what was the front of the car.

The automobile sat on its side with dents everywhere and a door almost torn off. I strained to remember what happened. I was pretty sure that Shuuichi was driving me home when… My head started to hurt; what had happened? Did we drive off the road and crash? It felt as though I had forgotten something important.

Gasping for air while trying to ease the pain in my legs, I nudged Shuuichi with my elbow. "Shuuichi," I called. "Get up, please."

But he didn't respond and his eyes stayed closed under his red bangs.

(GASP)

**Third Person's POV **(in other words, I'm too lazy to get into the set of mind of other characters at the moment)

"Would it be okay for me to leave early today?" Mamori asked as he pulled on his cap. Hana looked towards from where the sound of his voice came from and smiled. Her eyes saw nothing.

"Going to see your brother, Mamori?"

Mamori sighed, "Yes. If our family does not visit him, then I will—after all, he's my twin. He doesn't deserve the treatment he receives." Then he grasped his wife's hand and kissed it. "Even though I say that I don't believe the superstitions of my family, please don't take it in the way that I do not love you. I married you just for that reason, and that reason alone, nothing about keeping our blood pure."

Hana chuckled. "You always say that like a spell, as if I'd leave you for it." She paused and Mamori stared at her pale eyes patiently. "Maybe it would have been better for us not to have married, maybe then Kanna wouldn't have-"

Mamori cut her off as his face turned red, "Don't say that! Please, don't say that…" He began to cry, sobbing as Hana wrapped her arms around him, rubbing his back to soothe him.

**Shuuichi's POV**

I watched them fret over my wounds. My mother didn't deserve to see me like this, but I couldn't risk Kanna knowing anything before I was able to sort out what was going on (if she really knew nothing for it was what I cautiously assumed). I sat up and answered questions that the doctor and police asked. Every wound I carried, were all self-inflicted so as to not raised questions. It pained me to hurt Kanna even though she was left unhurt before.

**Kanna's POV**

"After your father let you drive home with Minamino, Shuuichi, what happened?" a large policeman stood beside where I laid on the bed that was cranked partway up. I was not very happy to be back in the hospital within a day.

"We were talking-ah, no, Shuuichi asked me something and then…" I strained to remember. Something had caused the crash but I don't remember seeing whatever that was. I groaned in pain since my head wouldn't stop throbbing.

There was a large beast—no, there were a lot of trees.

A hand came out of the ground—no, Shuuichi and I flipped over to our sides.

There were monsters—no, the glass shattered as we slammed right through them.

I started to turn into stone, right? –No, my legs got stuck getting almost impaled by the remaining glass.

Was there a man and child? Yes… there was, and the child was a young girl? Weren't they the ones to find us because of their dog?

"Are you alright?" the policeman touched my shoulder while pressing the red button on the remote next to me to call for the nurse. "Hey, kid, are you okay?"

Breathing heavily, I gripped my head as a flurry of nurses surrounded me. What was happening to me? My head kept playing two different things of the same scene.

**Third Person's POV** (yay! More plot tools :P)

"First you unknowingly hire a demon lord's heir to become a spirit detective, and then you overthrow your father for the throne. What are you planning now, for you to have called me, Koenma?" A tall man stood before Koenma's desk. He held a relaxed smile on his lips and his black hair fell over his face in long bangs that needed to be cut while the rest of his long hair was tied at the nape of his neck-but it wasn't that long since it came right under his shoulders.

The corner of Koenma's lips were pulled back to form a tight frown. "Shironosuke, do you know of this girl? Her name is Shikusa, Kanna." a picture of Kanna appeared on the screen that was behind the man. He turned, stared and faced the King of the Spirit world still wearing his smile.

"No, I do not-are you calling me a, what do they call it, a-a-a _player_?" he mused but the toddler did not laugh. "I apologize, but you must understand that I rarely leave my home anymore. I have not been in the human world for hundreds of years. I'm sure the last time I was there, it was during the Tokugawa reign in Japan. This girl, according the information on the screen, was born in the late twentieth century

Koenma stared at him for several moments longer but sighed and leaned back against his chair. "I'm sorry. I did not mean to bother you."

"Quite the contrary, I'm amused greatly. You really should start updating the files Koenma, sir," the man glanced at the screen again. "It says that she is five years old and dead-but in the picture, she is grinning and very much alive. She looks more to be a young woman than a stumbling child."

"Yes, yes, I know, anyways you may leave now, Shironosuke."

The large doors slammed shut behind the man, leaving him in darkness for there was no light hung in the hallways. There was never any need and they would simply cost too much. It was a waste of electricity and money.

Shironosuke walked for several minutes before slightly faltering in his strong strides and leaning against the wall, gasping. His hand flew to his chest, gripping his shirt as if he were in pain. "Poor, poor, child! You look so sweet, little Kanna, but it seems the wrath of Mai has fallen upon you. No one deserves this at all-but it is too late to be stopped." He shook his head while slowly regaining his composure. "I immensely apologize, even though you do not hear these words of mine, Kanna."

**Shuuichi's POV**

Four familiar people walked into my room.

"Wow, what's up with you being in the hospital, Kurama?" Kazuma Kuwabara asked glancing at the wires that hooked me up to a monitor and the I.V. drip that the nurses had slipped into my arm. "You always heal yourself don't you?"

"Circumstances," I smiled, shrugging. "I'm keeping my demon side from healing my human side at the moment."

"You're one weird fox," Shizuru Kuwabara poked my forhead with each word. "I thought you were some strong, great demon like Yusuke but what is this that I'm hearing you got into a car crash?"

"That hurts, Shizuru," I laughed.

"Anyways," Keiko smiled. "I have to visit my mother in another room. She fainted from over working herself again."

"We're going to join her, see ya," Kuwabara and his sister left with Keiko but the fourth person remained. She stood with slanted eyes next to me.

"Genkai," my smile disappeared. "A demon appeared in front of the car-it was after my friend. I was able to get her out of the car but then she was pulled into the Makai… through a gate created by a demon that, I assume, controlled the first one."

The psychic's eyes were wide at what I had told her. "They made an opening to the Ningenkai from the Makai?"

I nodded, grimly. "Yes and I unfortunately do not know who pulled her through. Do you think you could help me, Genkai?"

"Of course-"

"Shuuichi!" Mamori appeared at the door. "I'm so glad that I found you but what happened? Kanna had gotten so hurt, and she was just discharged yesterday!"

"Ah, I'm so sorry," I gave a slight smile. "I really don't remember what happened. I had hit my head so my memories are a bit off." He was about to say more but I spoke first. "By the way, Mamori-San… did something happen in the summer you took your family to the beach, twelve years ago? When Kanna was five?"

He paled at my question. "W-why do you ask?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, "Please, tell me what happened. Did Kanna get hurt-"

He waved his hands frantically, "There was nothing, Shuuichi. Absolutely-"

Then I heard some shouts from the doctors and nurses; patient in critical condition… name is Shikusa, Hana… Mamori reacted immediately, running to his wife's room.

"Come see me after you're discharged." Genkai then left.

**Kanna's POV**

"I'll be alright," she coughed. "Everything's going to be alright-"

"Don't say that," I begged, holding her hand tightly. She didn't seem sick. In fact, my mother looked completely healthy with her firm grip and wide smile... but the way she looked at me with weak eyes, and how her words cut through me...

"Why?" she mused.

"Because, if you say that... then you'll get sicker, or you'll di-" my words jumbled together in my throat, unable to push out as I watched her arch her back and open her mouth.

It was a silent scream, so all I saw was her thrashing around while the moniter went crazy. The nurses and doctors outside finally ran in due to the beeping. They started to pull me away, but I desperately held onto her hand.

No, I thought childishly. If I let go of her hand, then she'll-

_**BEEP-**_

There it went. The ominous, drawn out pitch from the moniter, sounding off that her heart had stopped. I looked at my empty hands while the hospital staff assigned to my mother ran around her, trying to revive her.

But I knew it was too late.

Dad screamed and cried and sobbed, holding Mom's cold hand on his knees next to her bed. I watched him cry and cry, but I noticed that there were no tears. The pain was simply too strong for him to react any more than yelling. Several nurses and doctors cried as well, having known Mom for several years.

It seemed as if I was the only one not crying for her.

I sat in my wheelchair, my legs bound and covered under several layers of bandages. I sat and waited for the pain to come for me, for me to be sad beyond my comprehension-I was even waiting for the shock to overwhelm me… but there was nothing. Only a few tears swelled in my eyes, but not enough to blur my vision.

I

was

just

not

sad

at

all

.

* * *

I'm so sorry I didn't update for the longest time ever.

But this just wasn't the best summer for me - gawd, I hate being a teenager.

It sucks, you know? I've recently been making plans on ways to kill myself D:

But then those bouts of depression stop for a moment and I'm like, "what the fudge am I thinking about? Did I just want to kill myself? Am I an idiot?" ... and then I just make myself more depressed

then there's the pressures of life and my idiocy trying to ruin my life

heck, I haven't even started my summer homework and my school year starts next week D:

also, I'm sorry that this chapter sucks and doesn't have a lot of excitement and then I ruined the mood several times over with my comments...

Um, let's see... oh yeah, I'm also missing my journal with all of my ideas for this story

I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE IT WENT -sob-

The only good thing in my life is that i'm going to be junior in high school

whilst at the same time, the bad thing is that I'm short and people always mistake me for a freshman XC

**REVIEWS:**

**shinoyami** - and here's the next chapter :) and truthfully, i really don't like how my story is going, I feel that it's going too fast and that I had forgotten to add some elements to the story thats important - sweet, new reader~~~

**American History Lover2009** - yay! someone thinks that this is interesting :3 ...hm, I haven't seen your name before, are you a new reader? YAY! 3

**xenocanaan** - you like it? yay! thanksss 3

**A Last Kiss For Succubus** - lol at your name. and deceased? well, his file did say that she was... so Yes! rofl - anyways, thanks for the review

**jinxedpixie** - everything is possible. you'll understand when humans start flying around like pretty little birdies ^^

**DaAmazingMeepers** - I'm happy that you're in suspense :)

**Crazy4YuYuHakusho** - z'omg indeed.

**Kaori Minamino** - I love plot twists ^^ they're the main reason I usually write stories hehehehe

**Pissed Off Irish Chick **- Hi C! congrats on being a senior now~ it's frustrating when ppl block you even though you have something very very important to tell them, whether they like it or not. so what's your main account?

**Death101- Fox Version **- like I said to, jinxedpixie- everything possible. :)


	11. The Calm before the Storm

le GASP! it's the ... one, two, three... EIGHTH CHAPTER! after A DECADE HAS PASSED. and I'm sorry, I meant to bring this out BEFORE may, but I guess I should have typed "before JUNE" xD

but you know that standardized testing that everyone has because BUSH decided to create that crappy "no child left behind" law? I mean, it SOUNDS great, but when you get down to the reality of it, most schools FAIL THE STANDARD because they don't HAVE THE FREAKING MONEY.

I mean, my parents are picky about where we live and move around and we always live in nice places so I go to nice schools (my recent school rents out LAPTOPS for ****'s sakes! LAPTOPS. DELL. LAPTOPS. for FIFTY DOLLARS a YEAR.)

Well, uh, getting back to my point, I just had them this week and is having my last one in the morning and then the rest of the school year is going to be nice and easy and smooth... oh, wait, no, I have online PE that I signed up for and have to do up until July... hmm...

Well, anyways, ENJOY

BTW this chapter is probabbblllyyyyyy gonna be the most BORING chapter you've ever readdddd but... um... DEAL WITH IT. XD

YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE I LIVE SO YOU CAN'T TRACK ME DOWN AND FORCE ME TO WRITE A BETTER ONE (well, maybe **Pissed Off Irish Chick**)

* * *

**Kanna's POV**

My mother was dead but my heart stayed still and uncaring. This realization left me trembling in both fear and confusion. With wide eyes I stared down at my bandaged legs, thoughts flying through my head, unable to take form. They stayed wispy and intangible in my mind. I gave a strange groan as my stomach tried to heave up its nonexistent contents, resulting in only air and stomach acid.

"Get Kanna back to her room," a doctor ordered and a crying nurse pushed me slowly away from the room but dad's sobs didn't get any quieter.

I sat for a long time in my bed. I couldn't lie down to rest. A few days later, Shuuichi was well enough to leave but came to visit, pulling a chair up next to me. He didn't speak, waiting patiently instead.

"Shuu-nii…" I looked at him in confusion and he stared back with a similar look. "There's something wrong with me." I thought that he paled and that his eyes narrowed at my statement but if he had, then it was only for a moment before the look disappeared. "I can't cry. I don't feel sad for my own _mother_."

I curled up into a ball, pulling my legs to my chest. "There's something wrong with me. I keep seeing horrible things, picturing horrible things that I haven't seen anywhere in my life—Not on TV, not at school—"

Shuuichi cut me off by grabbing a hold of my shoulders with a tight grip. "It's alright," he soothed. "Calm down."

I opened my mouth to speak more but my head became clouded while my eyes fell closed while my energy left my body.

"_Onii-San, wait for me," I called out running after him. I pulled on my slippers that were sitting on the step below then joined my mother and brother at the gate where father stood wearing his heavy overcoat and hat. It was common to wear the westerner's clothing now for the government officials, but that didn't keep father's hands from still being able to wield a katana efficiently—especially when compared to others who simply _claimed_ to be samurai. "Many arts and traditions were lost", Father would always talk in a sorrowed tone. "We must keep our family's style alive", he would say._

"_Otou-San," I called out happily and he embraced me in a warm hug, throwing me easily above him even though I was now ten years old. He was a tall man—taller than most Asian men at the time, even a few westerners—and he had broad shoulders that gave him a wide frame. He sat me on one of his shoulders but because I was not as small as I had used to be, I was also sitting partly on his raised arm in a strange way. I laughed at my father's foolishness but then I was caught by surprise when he disappeared from under me. I fell to the ground, pain surging through my body. Gasping, I looked up but saw that the rest of my family had disappeared as well._

_I saw our two story home engulfed in flames. "Otou-San," I called out weakly and somehow I knew that they were dying in those flames._

_At the same time, somewhere deep and buried in my mind, I also knew that this was a lie._

_**No**_**, **I thought strongly. _**That's not my family. This isn't **__my__** memory.**_I fought away the flames that threatened to engulf me. _**This is wrong!**_

I then found myself suspended in darkness.

"You," said a voice from behind me; it was a soft, lulling pitch that was similar to how my mother would talk when she would comfort me, "Are my descendant." Someone encircled their hands around my chest, slipping under my arms until they held me from behind. Fear and confusion froze me, keeping me from reacting. "You do not exist without reason—you exist only for me, only to do what I tell you. This body is virtually mine and soon you will disappear."

"No!" I screamed, trying to push her away as I twisted around—but my hands met nothing but air. She stood there, her face emotionless-_my_ face—no, we looked remarkably similar but we were not the same.

**Shuuichi's POV**

I forced Kanna to fall asleep because insomnia had been haunting her since Hana's death. Kanna's head rested on my shoulder and I kept my arms around her back for a few more moments before pushing her gently down onto the bed. I watched her for a few moments before noticing that the demon energy – _yoki_ – that acted like electricity then started to move on its own, wrapping around Kanna like a hand. She struggled against it and I waited a bit before focusing my own yoki together, pinning it onto her. The red wrappings quickly dispersed, returning back to acting like electricity, allowing Kanna to relax.

I closed my eyes and scanned the room, sending my energy out to see if there was anyone near that could have done so but I quickly abandoned the act. I knew full well that if there was such a demon that had done so, it would have left even me trembling. Taking one more look at Kanna, I quickly left and made my way to Mamori.

**Mamori's POV**

I watched him walk in with an agonizingly slow pace and every step closer shortened the time I had left with the remaining family I had. Every step took away a year of lying and tricking myself and others into believing an illusion. He looked at me expectedly, and I knew I couldn't run away from reality any longer. I hunched over in my seat, burying my face in my hands. The sun had long set and the staff had already taken my wife's body down to the morgue. I was left alone in the dark room without light until I was ready to move on. No one else was here to interrupt and so I had to tell him the full truth.

"First I want to ask," I started, not looking at him. "What made you ask about that particular summer? How do you know about it?"

He waited for a few moments. "I can't answer that." I didn't say anything to push the matter further. Now it was his turn. "Kanna—no, that girl hurt in the other room. That isn't Kanna is it? The _real_ Kanna, I mean."

Slowly, I forced myself to confirm it by nodding while my heart split apart into even more pieces.

"What happened that summer? What happened to Kanna?"

A shaky sob came up and I confessed to everything…

It was hot and humid and bright and warm. I had found a good beach side that my family could use without having to fight for place to lie down. I set up an umbrella and spread a couple towers while Hana took our daughter down to the waves. After half an hour we gathered to eat but Kanna stayed behind in the water. Even today, I still didn't understand why I had done what I did; why I had simply watched Kanna not come back but go further in to the water before disappearing in altogether. It took me a long time to react and by the time I did, it was too late. She was pale and her lips blue while her eyes stayed closed. I shook her while Hana cried in panic.

"Kanna drowned?" Shuuichi half asked and half stated incredulously.

"Yes," I stuttered, "then a strange man appeared in the chaos and I…" I shook my head violently, pain pulsing in my head. "I don't remember. I don't _want_ to remember. He…. She's…" I covered my mouth with hands for a few moments. "The Kanna you know now… the one we've been raising and loving and had as our replacement… she's supposed to be a doll. I don't understand everything—or anything for that matter… but…. But that girl is a _doll_."

"By 'doll' you mean…?"

"The toys that little girls are supposed to play with; the ones made out of plastic or ceramics, with the fake hair and fluffy dresses. The man's exact words were, 'the little marionettes hanging from the end of strings, controlled by a puppeteer is what she is'." I sighed deeply. "You must not believe me; even I have trouble believing in my own memories." Then shifted around in my seat and looked up—and saw no one. For a moment I thought that Shuuichi was never there, and I was only talking to myself to face my own lies but I painfully knew that that wasn't the case.

There was always something off about Shuuichi, even as a child. He seemed to know what most didn't; what most ignored or shrugged away or lost through hundreds of years. That child was a part of a world that most of us would never come to touch.

**Shuuichi's POV**

I stood at the door of the temple that served as a protection against certain apparitions. It didn't bother me as I brought no negative feelings with me. Genkai sat waiting for me on the front porch of her temple home. After I crossed halfway towards her, I abruptly stopped and stated, "You hold a secret having to do with the assassin, Akatatehacho*."

She closed her eyes and gave a soft nod. "Yes but it was never _my_ secret to keep. Fifty years ago, when Toguro was still human, we felt a strange and heavy mixture of spirit energy appear. We went to Hokkaido with our friends to find out who possessed the energy. A town almost lost in the countryside stood with its inhabitants practically worshiping a young woman; a human who possessed the mixed energy. Toguro of course immediately fought with her—and gravely lost. She was one of the catalysts to Toguro's want for more power. Although Toguro was the one that was defeated, the girl was wounded severely and weakened enough for the townspeople to overpower and kill her. They then took her body and burned it in front of certain urn that sat on a box."

I narrowed my eyes at what she had said, "Was it a black box tied close with a rope soaked in blood?"

Genkai paused for a moment, "Yes… I believe it was. Both items gave off a horrible aura. From what I could figure out, the urn contained the ashes of an ancestor of that girl who was able to pass on her memories and feelings through the generations. With her powers, the people revered her but after she was weakened, they immediately turned on her."

"They were biding their time so as to find a way to kill her." I took a breath, looking at the wide forests that surrounded the temple. "When I visited that town, I took notice that the people there lived with a countless number of superstitions."

"And with much reason," the psychic nodded.

Running my hands through my hair, I let out a deep sigh but I stopped immediately when I realized that I was losing myself—I had become almost completely human. Little habits and movements that I acquired was that of a human and not of a demon. My hands fidgeted and my feet shuffled, unable to stay still. For a moment, my own body was a foreign being, someone I didn't recognize. I clenched my fists and closed my eyes. No this body belonged to me. I knew that. I just didn't want to accept for a long time. Even now I failed to allow myself to be human. I inwardly chuckled both as a demon and as a human. My demon side cynically remarked that I just needed to get rid of what tied me to the past so that I could move on. My human side assured that it was simple stubbornness.

"Kurama," Genkai called to me grimly. "As a yoko, you were the cause of the woman's sadness, was it not?"

I was mildly shocked that she knew. "Yes… I was."

**Genkai's POV**

The memory was fresh in my mind, and I played it over and over several times whenever something sparked its return to the surface. Kurama left quickly for another destination while I basked in the morning sun.

_There were five of us; the Toguro brothers, two old friends and me. It wasn't a particularly busy day and we were simply lounging about on a mountain that was in Nagano prefecture. Near the evening, a strange spirit energy spiked in the north and we chased after it. We ended up in Hokkaido where snow blanketed the ground throughout most of the year. The source of the energy was off towards the center of the land and lost in the heart of the open country that was guarded by a wall of trees. It was a town seemingly untouched by time. Its people gathered near a single house where a woman haphazardly spun a katana in her hands. She would push the blade far away from her body and have the tip pass across one of the bystander's necks._

"_Toguro, do you sense that?" I asked while we walked closer._

"_It's a mix of yo-ki and rei-ki…" he smirked. "That's interesting."_

"_Toguro, don't be too hasty," our friends warned and I motioned in agreement._

_Younger Toguro then focused his energy together before slightly releasing it; he was creating a beacon so as to catch the woman's attention. She stopped swinging her sword and faced him. For a moment, the two stared the other one down when I noticed that something was off about the woman. She then pulled her dark hair back away from her face, revealing her red eyes. Her spirit and demon energy mixture flickered around her._

"_Toguro," I tried calling out to him and bring him back to his senses but he was already lost in his excitement. Elder Toguro stayed behind while his otouto** charged at her, swiping his fist down. At first, I thought I saw a spray of blood fly into the air but the woman had disappeared and the "blood" was hundreds of red butterflies. Everyone stood in both shock and awe. The butterflies then quickly formed back together into the woman and she struck down on Toguro, leaving a bright gash on his back. He howled in pain, dropping to his knees before he twisted around and landed a punch on her. Surprised, she stumbled away before laughing a few moments later._

"_Fun, how fun, oh how fun," she giggled and gasped and screeched in ecstasy before abruptly stopping. Younger Toguro charged at her again but this time, she didn't turn into butterflies. The woman was pushed into a building and stayed there, unconscious now. That was when I saw that the demon energy had disappeared. By the time Toguro retaliated, she was human again._

_Toguro also realized this and backed away, joining our group while the townspeople gathered around the woman that was lying in the crumpled ruins of a house's wall. "Worship?" a friend of ours commented._

"_Perhaps they deemed her a God," another remarked, "And they are now surprised at how she was defeated."_

_I was about to agree until I saw the hatchets gleaming in the hands of an old man. The townspeople parted to allow him to pass through. He raised the hand-axe and struck the woman several times, hacking away at her. Everyone seemed nonchalant and emotionless to his actions. Younger Toguro stepped away in confusion while elder Toguro gave a soft chuckle. The rest of us watched in horror. Toguro grunted in pain as blood trickled down his back, the gash aggravated by his movement and the cold air._

"_I lost," he grunted with a scowl. "She passed out—at the rate it was going, I would have suffered even more." I noticed that he was burning with frustration and his need to grow stronger grew furiously larger inside of him. The people paid no mind to us as they moved the body back in front of the large building had been standing at earlier. They brought out an urn that had seals painted and glazed onto it, perched on top of a black box that was tied closed with a rope—turned a rustic red by dried blood._

_They proceeded to burn the disfigured corpse in front of the two items and then I heard a strange, scream rise out of the throat of the dead body. A strong wind threw people away from the urn and box. The body then quickly disintegrated into ashes, faster than normal. The scream disappeared with the wind, leaving behind an intense smell of iron metal and salt—the smell of blood. It was incredibly heavy and I covered my nose with no success of blocking it out._

"_The curse of Akatatehacho is gone!"_

"_The curse is gone!"_

"_Broken!_

"_Akatatehacho is dead again!"_

_They people chanted and cheered._

"_Akatatehacho," a friend stated incredulously. We looked towards him for answers. "She was an assassin that existed at the end of the Tokugawa reign and the beginning of the Meiji era."_

"_That was over fifty years ago," I frowned._

_He nodded, "Yes, she was famous in Makai for having attained the powers of a demon. She was often seen clashing with the yoko bandit, Kurama. You cross her and you're as good as dead—apparently, she became a demon just to kill him."_

"_How did he cross into Ningenkai?"_

_He shrugged, "Foxes can do whatever they damn well please, it's annoying. Though, with her powers and abilities, you'd think she's from the beginning of the Tokugawa reign where demons ran high and mighty right before the portal was sealed the first time, and not at the end of it." They looked at the scene again with their red eyes, licking their lips as they analyzed it. "Akatatehacho must have found a way to be reborn in her descendents over and over again. There's a weird connection between the urn and the black box."_

"_And the urn contains her ashes, no doubt," Younger Toguro glanced it before turning around. He was now struggling to stay upright._

"_She left behind poison," I stated when I saw a sliver of a purple colored liquid in his gash._

"_I need to get stronger," he growled._

**Kanna's POV**

"Get up," the voice snarled, commanding me with enough force through its words to jolt me awake. I took a deep, forced breath with pain dancing in my chest. Getting to my feet, I tried to refuse the order while my body moved on its own and out of the hospital. I ripped out the I.V. from my wrist but blood didn't leave where the needle had gone through. Instead, my skin healed quickly before it could do so. I changed out of my given hospital garb and left when the nurses were distracted with other patients. My body wouldn't listen to me as someone else piloted it.

"Where are you taking me?" I was able to ask.

With my own lips, was a response; "Home."

I wanted to ask why but I no longer controlled anything. The house was dark, empty, and cold. She took us up the stairs and to my father's room. For a moment, we stood there, and I saw myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess but my eyes stole my attention completely—they were shining a bright red in the lightless room. I could only scream in horror inwardly while my body moved towards the bed stand. My body shuffled through its contents until a black box appeared, buried under papers.

It was the box that contained the red butterfly the day the shack collapsed onto me—the day everything started.

"How sweet that your father kept this for me," she spoke through me again and I felt a malevolent air swell up inside my chest.

* * *

**THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEWS - and REMEMBER, the are ALWAYS appreciated :D**

* _**Akatatehacho**_ - Red admiral [butterfly] – "aka" means red, and with tatehacho, its Red Admiral but the "Cho" at the end means butterfly – "Akatatecho" is indeed hard to keep spelling it, but I chose this because it is very moshitso, or "cool" as it basically is the nickname or title given to the ancestor

** **Otouto ** - Younger brother

**REVIEWERS**

**Kuro Neko To Kuro Bara** - Thank you for the review :) Gawd, you don't know half the stories I want to put down onto but can't because they're SO BAD and this is the only one that is semi-good which is why I'm trying to finish it...

**Murasaki Hikari** - Thank you a lot :) it means a lot to me. I'm trying to add more details... but I can't seem to do that with this fandom :( I'm currently trying to put out a **Twelve Kingdoms** fanfic and wow, it has a LOT of detail compared to this one but I just can't make this any more detailed than it already is for the life of me... but I'm happy that its kept its claws latched onto you :D

**DaAmazingMeepers** - I still think that you've got an awesome name... thanks for the review!

**The Last Kiss for Succubus** - -sqqueeeeee- I'm someone's plot hero? XD thank you for the review :D

**Kaori Minamino** - So how was college sophomore year? And sorry for another non-actiony chapter D: thanks for the reviewwww -heart-

**Akari Tsubasa** - I wanna know what happens too... but my brain is only giving my tidbits of information that I need to write... and its always changing which is actually something I hate... thanks for the review! :D

**yueaifeng** - It's a "really really good story" ? :D really? :D thank youuuuu XD

**Pissed off Irish Chick_ - _**I think I'll just start calling you **C**, because your name is long and bothersome... IF YOU DON'T READ THIS TONIGHT, I WILL BOTHER YOU AT SCHOOL TOMORROW... if I see you... -starrreeee-

**D101 - Fox Version** - Your name is really curious... does it have a meaning? anyways, thanks for the review! Sorry about any confusion but I switch POVs because there are something things I can't show in one character's POV :(

-**If I missed anyone for the reviews, I apologize :(**-


	12. Let's Cry Blood

Sorry, sorry-*breaks off into singing Sorry Sorry by Super Junior*-Ahem, about, um, another boring chapter :( I also tried to focus more on description rather than having a mostly dialogue driven story. Blahh, I need to stop giving you guys boring chapters x.x

**I'm sure you have all noticed by now (hopefully) but if you haven't, I'll say it here; I changed the rating of the story from Teen to Mature –NOT because there will be any "woohoos" starting from this chapter, but because the violence and gore levels have stepped up a bit because after reading YYH and Yoshihiro Togashi-sensei's other work, HunterxHunter, I've come to realize they're actually **_**very**_** violent and **_**very**_** gory so I wanted to follow his work a bit more… which certainly does include, indulging a bit more on Kurama's merciless past…**

* * *

"_Go away_!" I screamed at her in my mind, unable to use my mouth anymore. I had lost all control over my own body. "_I don't care who you are or what you want, but you have no right to do this_!"

She ignored me, pulling up _my_ hair with _my _hands into a ponytail. I watched her in the mirror, rummaging through the new makeup my father kept buying for my mother each year with the hope she would come home and not have old, stale makeup waiting for her.

"How curious, this new era has such different makeup," she applied some lipstick onto my lips. "Your memories are quite useful—they kept me from going into shock of all your new strange machinery. Horse-drawn carriages have been replaced by your _cars_. I cannot recognize the Japan I knew, let alone a single street. Even the kanji is different. Appearing in a city, however, is much more interesting and useful than appearing in that small little town."* She paused for a moment, staring at my face in the mirror before there being a strange twisted look of fright. Quickly, she pulled my hair out of its ponytail and arranged it into a different style but I could feel a strange, terror-gripped bubble swell in my chest.

Then I ignored her and shut myself away in my memories as I let her defile the presents my father had carefully chosen for mother. I recalled to the time before we moved away from the house that was packed away on the same street as Shuuichi's. Every morning, I would hurriedly eat the breakfast my mother had set up in the dining room, forcing down the rice and side dishes with a little bowl of warm soup. Right after I finished, I ran back upstairs to my room to hastily twist out of my pajamas and into my elementary school uniform. When I thundered down the stairs, Shuuichi would be waiting at the front door holding the bright yellow hat* that was a part of the uniform, in his hands. Often times I would trip and fall onto my hands but adamantly ignored the pain so as to hurry and slip on my shoes.

"_You don't have to hurry, Kanna_," Shuuichi would remind me. He also wore the same cap for we attended the same elementary school. In this particular memory, he was twelve years old while I was ten. After jumping onto my feet and pulling on my backpack, he pushed the hat over my head. I grabbed his hand and we left the house, "_Ittekimasu_*!"

We walked off together soon joining in with a larger group of other kids from our neighborhood that attended the same school. We formed a group of bobbing yellow hats worn by elementary children age's six to twelve*. It was a relatively short walk to me in the present time, but when I was a child it was a long and tiring journey. Other children would point out "dangers" of how a dinosaur or an oni* was going to pop out in the dark alleys. The older children held the youngest of hands when crossing the street or sometimes stopped a certain boy, Yukito Yamamoto, from wandering off and following the first little animal that popped up in his line-of-sight. Yukito was an interesting boy who was in the grade between Shuuichi and me. He had an affinity to animals and would unknowingly try to touch them whenever he came across one—completely forgetting his surroundings which would result in haphazardly crossing the street before the cars stopped.

The rest of the school day went normally until the final lesson of the day. I sat in a class with other fourth years at low wooden tables. For some, their legs were folded beneath them while others sat in other, more comfortable, positions. We all held calligraphy brushes and practiced writing hiragana and hundreds upon hundreds of Chinese characters.

"_Kanna-chan, my hand is cramping_!" whined my classmate who sat next to me.

I tearfully squirmed around, "_Mine is too_!"

"_A-i-u-e-o, ka-ki-ku-ke-ko, sa-shi-su-se-so, ta-chi-tsu_—*" the repetitive phonetic sounds from my mouth was cut short when the door rattled opened loudly. The students looked up to see the principal wearing a grim look on his face. He stared at me for a few moments.

"_Kanna Shikusa, could you step out here for a moment please_?" he called and I gently set my brush down, careful of the ink to keep it from getting on anything. I ran out into the hall where I almost fell by stumbling over my slippers.

"_Careful, now,_" he raised a hand. "_Kanna, your mother was just admitted into the hospital after a fire broke out in your home. Your father requested for Shuuichi to take you to the hospital, so go gather your things and meet him at the front door_."

I nodded frantically before running to gather my backpack and then back out into the hallways, not bothering to put away my things. I saw Shuuichi standing at the door with my shoes already placed out of my locker. Quickly, I kicked off my school slippers to put on my shoes while pulling my hat forcefully onto my head. Shuuichi took my slippers and put them into my locker calmly. "_It'll be alright, Kanna_."

I grabbed his hand and he led me out of the school grounds and to a bus stop where we waited to be taken to a different stop where we went into the subway. From the subway, we returned to ground level where we took a bus that finally led to the hospital. My father was waiting for us with his face blanched white and his shoulders shrugged over. Sweat glistened on his face and the corners of his lips were pulled down from the weights of worry. When he saw Shuuichi and me, he promptly straightened out his posture and wiped away at his sweat. After several hours, my mother was finally released from surgery. Most of the lights in the hospital were now turned off or dimmed down. My father hurried to talk with the doctor but before I entered the room, Shuuichi's mother, Shiori appeared to pick him up. Afterwards, I was momentarily left alone where I rapidly ran to my mother's room.

However, before I went through her door, I saw a man standing in the dark shadows of the hallway several feet away. He stood straight and tall, staring down at me with bright blue eyes that could be clearly seen in the dark. He wore a scowl, and his neutral gaze turned into a glare. I shrunk away, stepping closer to my mother's closed door while trying to grasp ahold of the handle but panic had already risen inside my chest and kept me from having proper hand-eye coordination.

"_She should have died_," he hissed and I fell down to the ground, leaning against the door with my legs folded against me. He muttered more words that I could not recall before he turned and disappeared, seemingly disappearing into the shadows. After taking a few deep breaths, I finally entered my mother's room while trying to calm my trembling.

"_Mama_?" I called. She lied still on the bed with only her chest moving up and down.

"_There weren't as many burns as we expected, nor were they very severe. They were, on the most part, only first degree burns as the fire department and neighbors were able to reach her swiftly, and she was also in a safer area of the home,_" the voice of the doctor could be heard through the door behind me. "_But even though they are not serious, the burns cover most of her body and she has been put under a medically induced coma and given pain relievers intravenously. There are a few second degree burns found around her legs but are superficial._"

"_So she'll be fine_?" came my father's worried voice.

"_Yes, we will awaken her in a few days but besides the burns, she'll be fine. The current risks are minimal._" Unfortunately, when she had awoken, she was found to be blind but with no known causes as staring into a fire could only cause temporary blindness.

Suddenly, against my will, I was pulled out of my memories and I saw my own face in the mirror twisted into a seething glower.

"That _bastard_," my voice screeched. "How _dare_ he!" She hit the mirror in anger and the glass shattered out into a spider web design. She kept hitting the mirror over and over and I watched pieces dance off and cut through my hand. Pain snaked up my arm but I couldn't react externally or stop her from beating the mirror. Blood dripped from my hand and I expected it to close like at the hospital but it did no such thing. The red liquid kept escaping, splashing onto the makeup and mahogany dresser and glass shards that littered the top of it. Curiosity and fear flickered in the back of my mind and I rummaged through my memories. I knew that it was something in my memories that sparked her sudden fit of rage.

And immediately, I focused on the man standing in the dark hallway with the bright blue eyes. I felt a strike of pain pierce through my head and I doubled over—no, it was my body's captor that did so—falling to the ground on my knees. Standing there with a glare and bright blue eyes that glowed in the darkness…standing there with longer hair and in a more traditional attire of a kimono, two images of the man overlapped but the eyes were the same. In one memory, in _my_ memory, he wore a scowl while the one that belonged to my imprisoner had him standing with an amused grin. Then her memory completely took over and I saw him with wide, surprised eyes; his mouth partly open in a strained gasp. Two pale hands hold a knife to his gut; blood seeped through his clothing and unto the pale hands, painting them red before he collapses onto the ground.

"He's supposed to be _dead_—supposed to be dead, dead, dead," my voice muttered over and over while my hands gripped the carpeted ground, staining the white with dark red sins. Unexpectedly, the pain worsened and I suddenly found myself _alone_. My body had been returned and the voice that had temporarily gained control was now quiet and seemingly gone. I trembled and sat in the dark room, not knowing what to do—dumbstruck over the man with the hollow blue eyes.

**Shuuichi's POV**

I felt the flare of energy again—the one that tried to consume Kanna at the hospital. It was the sharp, unstable ki* that was all too familiar to myself now that I had started to recall a past I had cast aside before. It hit me softly in waves, pulsating like a heartbeat. It was much duller compared to the sharpness it was earlier.

As I made my way towards the energy, I recalled the last time I had seen the woman before her eyes had turned red—the ancestor of the Shikusa family who was slain in violent anger. It was the last time we were to cross paths before the assassin made me her personal target. There was little light, only available from the moon and the strings of lanterns that were hung on the houses.

And I admit, it was my own fault that I had become the Assassin's target.

I was the reason why that she had sought out the power of youkai that I, myself, had gained several decades before.

I was the reason why Kanna—or at least the doll—and her family were suffering.

**Hana's POV** –moments before her death-

Lying in the hospital bed that I had become so accustomed to because of my illness, I stared hard at the teenager in front of me. Even though I could not actually see her, I knew how she was. Kanna held my hand in a panic state, worried over my wellbeing. I wanted to tell her how much I loved her even if she weren't my daughter, but I kept silent because I knew that the child did not know the truth. It had become years since I last felt uncomfortable over the fact but as long as the child did know the truth herself, I was easily able to play make-believe.

I was scared, that our play of "house" would break apart if I brought anything of the past up—and I knew Mamori felt the same. She mumbled nonsense, brought on by her state of panic.

I love you, Kanna.

I love you, even though you are not my blood daughter.

Child, did you know that you had a secret name that I gave you? If you ask Mamori, then he will tell you.

I love you, Aiko*.

Thank you, for having given me the chance to raise Kanna.

**Shuuichi's POV**

Kuronue and I had returned to Ningenkai, finding a way through the kekkai barrier again. We had done so several times before, always eluding the spirit detectives sent after us.

We laid our eyes on a foreign item kept "safely" in a monk's temple. The assassin was assigned to target the head monk of the same temple. I broke through the weak barriers and puzzles that were set up to allow Kurounue retrieve our reward. The wind picked up and carried the smell of blood to my nose. Straightaway, I raised my awareness and stretched out my ki* so as to sense for any immediate threats.

"Kurama," Kurounue called out in the darkness, his wings twitching.

I nodded in acknowledgment. Kuronue then slipped out towards one direction while I went the opposite. The assassin stood on the rooftop and our eyes met for a brief moment; hers still black at that time. I saw the glistening of blood as it dripped from the heavy sack in her hand and its thin cloth conformed to what it held, drawing the outlines of the monk's face. She then turned away, jumping from the roof to take the head to her patron.

The air passed along the faint tapping of feet to my ears and I quickly jumped into the shadows. For a brief moment, I watched as monks stumbled in shock and panic they took notice of the assassination and thievery. I was amused only slightly as I had seen such actions many times before. When they moved away from where I hid, I took my chance to leave and meet up with Kurounue. As I traveled through the night, a peculiar energy caught my interest. I immediately switched paths and arrived at a small, fenced in house where I saw a single man moving through its hallways. He paused at an open door and looked directly towards me, taking me by surprise. The human man gave a faint smile before sliding the door closed and returning to his previous task of carrying a boiling pot to an inner room. I entered the home and followed him to the inner room where he sat with tea set up to his side on a small serving table while he slowly carved at a wooden doll.

"May I help you?" he asked in a calm voice, not looking away from his task. I looked up at the source of the energy; a doll, of which that sat upon a small shrine-like stand at the back of the room. Several other dolls—all incomplete—sat around this lone, completed doll. They were all the man's making, I could only assume, as I watched him carefully form the nose of the one in his hands. All of the dolls were carved in a western style and wore western clothing. I gave no response and the man glanced to my feet. "You are stepping on the cloth corner of a tatami mat; you will encounter bad luck."*

I scoffed, "Humans and their fears of superstitions; I find it funny—I do not fear of this bad luck for it does not exist. My luck has been abundant as I create it for myself."*

He stopped momentarily and stared up at me, his lips curved at the ends in an odd smile. "The bad luck will not necessarily befall you, youko," he paused. "Nor will you encounter it only a single time." The darkness of the room started to overwhelm my senses and the light from the single candle in the corner seemed to dull. My ears twitched trying to make sense of the sudden appearance and mix of energies inside the room—and the man was the source. "You are not welcome to the doll."

"It's interesting," immediately after the words finished resonating in the air between us, I threw my hand forward to tear through the man as he stood to defend his possession. He pulled out a katana that was hidden under the shrine, pushing the blade towards my gut. I used my right hand to grab the blade to keep it from entering my gut. We stood like so for several moments, waiting for the other to falter—I gripped the blade away from my gut while my other hand also fought against another blade. The human held up a small knife to keep my hand from fully reaching around his neck but my fingers were still able to reach his throat where my nails dug into his skin and muscles. The blood from my fingers allowed the katana to slowly slip forward, closer to my gut. He was abnormally fast and had taken me by surprise.

"It seems that I lose," the man spoke out in a wavering, gritty voice that was laced with pain. Then the strength from his arms fell away, allowing me to push my fingers into his neck. The blood pushed out into the open air after I brought my hand back to my side. The katana and knife fell to the ground with their wielder. His body fell into the serving table, causing the teapot to knock over and spill onto him. I could hear a sizzle as the water seeped through his kimono and burn his skin. I shook my hands of the excess blood and grabbed the doll. I turned to leave but a woman stood at the door before me with her eyes wide open in shock.

It was the assassin who I had encountered several times in the past but her western mask was off—the strange, white one with red markings. Under it, was a young woman with large black eyes and pale skin with a red glow on her cheeks, either due to being a part of her natural complexion or because she had run here. She looked down at the slain man whose eyes were also wide open, rolled back and staring at the ceiling.

I saw the gleam of her blade in the corner of my eye before I heard her move or notice that she had pulled it out of its sheathe. She swung the katana as fast and hard as she could but I was no longer in the mood to deal with any more conflict. Quickly, I dodged her swings and sprinted out of the home. A scream of rage erupted from the usually mute assassin—was he her family? Her lover?

I dashed easily ahead but I stopped and faced her, waiting for them to challenge me. The assassin was significantly slower as she was only human. I dodged every one of her attacks with a mocking smile. In a show of power and strength—to shove before the large gap that existed between us—I slipped behind her and cut the muscles behind her knees with my nails. She cried out in pain and collapsed onto the roof but used her hand to keep herself from fully lying down. I used my rose whip to grab the blade and toss it several yards from us onto another rooftop. She glared at me and pulled out a small hand-knife from under her obi, but I swiped and tossed it aside as well. I then kneeled before her and grabbed her neck, making a point by digging my nails into her skin. The human woman who I had just seen earlier in the night, behead and get away with the murder was now powerless and struggling against me.

"Too slow and too weak," I spoke in a hoarse, low whisper. "Ah? Are you crying now?" I chuckled. "I know that you understand that your tears are for your weak self, for your lack of strength and ability—not for that human man. If you want to kill me, I suggest you find a way to get stronger. You _humans_ are nothing in the eyes of youkai." I squeezed her neck harder, making her struggle to breathe.

I briefly returned to the present, withdrawing from my memories as I arrived to Kanna's home. Inside, the house was dark and untouched and I could smell the distinct scent of blood. Calmly, I sprinted up the stairs to Mamori and Hana's room where the source of the energy and blood was. Kanna sat on the ground, surrounded by broken glass from the vanity mirror. Her hands and forearms had cuts from the shards and were bleeding profusely. She looked up at me with eyes full of confusion and terror and twisted around towards me. Her whole frame painted a picture of a lost child that had sat down, no longer knowing of what to do or go next.

"Shuu-nii," she called out to me. Her voice was saturated with panic and it was that that had me reel back on my heels at a complete loss. "Save me."

I returned to my memory of the assassin who was an ancestor within the Shikusa bloodline.

I remembered clearly as to what happened next after squeezing her throat.

The assassin arched away from me and her mouth gasped open in pain as I tore my fingers into her black eyes.

* * *

**Japanese Culture and Language Notes:**

*"**Even the kanji is different**." – what I mean here is that, a lot of words have changed in meaning or have double meanings in the modern time (or double meanings used in the past are lost or no longer used) and also the _font_ is different; it's not just traditional brush calligraphy, there's blocky computerized or other stylized version of any language in today's world for different companies and clubs and things like that.

***bright yellow hat** – in Japan, preschools, kindergartens and elementary schools have a brightly colored hat as part of the uniform because most, if not all, children walk to school and to keep them from being run over, they wear bright hats so they're easily seen walking around the neighborhood. And on the note of walking, unlike in America (I don't know about other readers in other countries but FF stats say most of you readers are from the US) there are no school buses that pick up students. You either have to walk the whole way, ride the bus, ride the subway, or a mix of them. Only spoiled rich kids that attend the pompous rich kids private schools get a car ride to school.

*"**Ittekimasu**" – there is no direct translation to English but it's basically what one says when you leave the house… the closest translation would be something like "I'll be back". If you really want a direct-direct translation, it's "I am leaving and will be back". lolz

***ages six to twelve** – school system in Japan goes like this (in comparison to the American school system): Elementary are grades 1-6, Junior High/Middle are grades 7-9, and Senior High/High school are grades 10 – 12. However, in Japan it's counted as Elementary 1-6, Junior High 1-3, Senior High 1-3 which is why in manga and anime they go "Oh, I'm a third year!" or "I'm in class 2-B" which stands for year 2, class B. So in Japanese language, one introduces themselves mentioning if they're in elementary, middle, or high before saying their year; for example, "Watashi wa koukou ni-nensei desu" is "I am a 2nd year in high school" – koukou is high school, and ni-nensei is 2nd year student.

***Oni** – refers to "**trolls**" or "**ogres**" but more commonly in English is translated into "demon" just as "**yokai**" is translated into demon – HOWEVER, it is actually _wrong_ and is used since the modern use for demon is more commonly used to mean a "monster" or something like that. In actuality, an "oni" or "yokai" are formed of the unknown and are actually mythical beasts or monsters… so if translators seriously wanted to translate it, it would be "monster" rather than "demon" but the proper use of the words transferred over to the English language could actually stay as "yokai" and "oni" as there are no actual translatable words available. And on that note, I don't use "demon" as a translation word for "yokai" and "oni" since a "demon" is of Biblical origins and means for the… well, demons or the Devil himself. The word for "demon" or "devil" of Biblical origins in Japanese is actually the word "**akuma**". (which is presently famous in use by a certain famous –and sexy- butler in all black who always says, "_Watashi wa akuma de shitsuji desu kara_")

***"A-i-u-e-o, ka-ki-ku-ke-ko, sa-shi-su-se-so, ta-chi-tsu…"** said by Kanna, are the basic phonetic sounds of the Japanese language that are represented by hiragana. As she is drawing/writing each character, she says them out loud. As you can see, there is a repetition of basic sound which is "Ah-ee-ooh-eh-o" and then goes on to the rest of the alphabet which is 46 in total.

***Aiko** – Japanese name, meaning "Love Child"… which in English sounds completely NOT how I want it to lololololololol….

***ki** – one's life energy

***"You are stepping on the cloth corner of a tatami mat; you will encounter bad luck." – **Japanese superstition- I have NO idea as to how or where it originated

*"**…My luck has been great as I create it for myself…**" - *starts singing* "Luck be a lady~ tonight~~" yes I totally asterisked this because I wanted to tell everyone that I like Frank Sinatra music ;)

* * *

okay, i've given up on doing the "thank yous" for every each one of you because it takes a long time, and I'm sure everyone's been waiting for this chapter :3

**btw tho, please don't just leave a review as "i like it" or "i didn't like it" - those aren't reviews, those are comments-they make me feel great, but leave me hanging as a "well, WHY?" so please at least state why you like or dont like it :)**


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